Kevin Dillon Quotes
I'm a big fan of comedians not having to apologize for anything. Nowadays it seems comedians are always apologizing for being funny.
Quotes to Explore
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What's great about stand-up is that you can say whatever you want and go around the country, and sometimes the world, and work on it and see how people react. You don't need Standards & Practices or notes from lawyers or producers to tell you what's funny.
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The Midwest breeds funny, eccentric people, to varying degrees. You play shows not because you're expecting to get a record deal, but to do something fun outside of mowing lawns. Everything else is just gravy... Or mustard.
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Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
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I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent.
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Most things I get hired on, I get hired because I improvise something funny, or they just think I look weird.
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But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that.
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A mate of mine told me recently, 'It's the first time I've seen you work, Worthington.' I thought that was quite funny, but he was right.
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What's funny in 'The Mayor of MacDougal Street' is how Dave Van Ronk talks a lot about the time and how exciting it was and how electric it was.
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I did accents and funny voices for the family when I was growing up.
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If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
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Flirting is funny. And it's awkward and weird.
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I got tired of books where the boy is a bit thick and the girl's very clever. Why does it have to such an opposition? Why can't they be like the girls and boys that I know personally, who are equally funny and equally cross? Who get things equally wrong and are equally brave? And make the same mistakes?
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Jack Black is so funny! On and off screen, like, he would make you laugh every day. He's hilarious.
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Our records, if you have a dark sense of humor, were funny, but our records weren't about comedy. They were about protests, fantasy, confrontation and all that.
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I have my website, The Ruckus, which is an Internet site, similar to the Funny or Die format, where people post funny videos. I get a chance to rate their videos; they get a chance to blog and kick it with me.
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I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.
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The funny thing is that I'm the girl who no one sees at the beach. Ask anyone who's traveled with me. Normally, I'm in so many layers, I look like Lawrence of Arabia!
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I definitely at times notice a difference in service when I go out. You know, I can walk in to grab a cup of coffee or walk in to have lunch or dinner, and people definitely seem on their best behavior, which is funny, or I start to see people clean up around me, which I always find really, really amusing.
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I got jury duty and I didn't want to go, so my friend said, "You should write something really really racist on the form when you return it. Like, you should put 'I hate chinks'." And I said, "I'm not going to put that on there just to get out of jury duty. I don't want people to think that about me." So instead I wrote, "I love chinks." And who doesn't?
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I don't want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.
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I think a good designer can exist everywhere and anywhere and all the time. It's all about being good, and I think that our job basically is to make women and men look good.
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There's a good television programme called 'Disco 2.' It's quite good but again it's average, average. It's all on a down play. You know we've got this thing in England to be hip is to speak very down - like John Peel. And that just about sums up England. They don't realize when they talk like that, then that is what they represent - absolutely.
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I'm a big fan of comedians not having to apologize for anything. Nowadays it seems comedians are always apologizing for being funny.
