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The biggest shock of your life is when you first make a record and go to a show and then people start singing the words. Because it occurs to you that they've listened to it!
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Is Thom Yorke there? Oh he is? Well then how the can I be Thom Yorke, talking to you, right here, on the phone.
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Sometimes I stand in store windows and pretend to be a mannequin. People are like 'hey, that mannequin looks alot like thom yorke' Then I start to sing The Gloaming and lurch toward them and they run off horrified.
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Look at that fat kid, in the audience. You want some pie you little fatty? I strongly dislike fat kids. Security, please remove him, that fat kid, over there, by the pies.
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When you're a parent, then you still have to commit to this concept of, "Okay, I'm basically out of action now for three months."
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I can't wait to die so I can be a skeleton and play my chest like a xylophone.
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If you don't trust everybody on stage with you, then you're in trouble.
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I actually saw the loch ness monster when I was 9. She was big as a house. Want to know who the loch ness monster is? It's your obese mother. Burn mother****er
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Up above Aliens hover Making home movies For the folks back home Of all these weird creatures Who lock up their spirits Drill holes in themselves And live for their secrets.
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Well actually I'm not a man but a carrot. The band was eating salads one day and a carrot fell off of the salad bar onto a microphone and the band realized that they had just discovered something brilliant. Me.
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The more you try to erase me The more, the more The more that I appear
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Electronic music is really weird right, because it is bleeding into the mainstream, but, at the same time, it's fashion.
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I'm not a martyr, just a musician who dies for your sins. Oh, that's what a martyr is? Very well then, I am a martyr, if you insist.
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I'm banned from Middlebrook elementary for telling dirty jokes to the janitor. The janitor! He cleans up dirt for a living.
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I would rather do things that I really love with people that I love working with, and to be able to extend that and go and play, it's great. I feel very fortunate.
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In November I'll be releasing my new solo record, entitled 'Box Of Bees'. There's no music, it's just a box full of live bees. The deluxe edition comes with more bees.
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One person can't change the world. But Thom Yorke can, because he's two people. Both of them are Thom Yorke.
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If you forget about the money issue for just a minute, if it's possible to do that - because these are people's livelihoods we're talking about - and you look at Internet in terms of the most amazing broadcasting network ever built, then it's completely different. In some ways, that's the best way of looking at it.
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I'd like to run for president. Or Prime Minister. I think I could do a better job.
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I know I'm 38 but I insist that santa claus exists and he raped my mother when I was 9.
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I often steal sandwiches, eat them, and put the container's back., with a signed autograph of my self in its place. It's my way of giving back to society.
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And if the world does turn, and if London burns, I'll be standing on the beach with my guitar. I want to be in a band, when I get to Heaven. Anyone can play guitar, and they won't be a nothing anymore.
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I tied a bunch of balloons to a beach chair and tried to float up to heaven. *begins to weep* There's no heaven, and birds tried to kill me! *shrivels up*
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Don't get any big ideas They're not gonna happen.