Funny Quotes
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I just find all that stuff incredibly funny. I love a fart. I'd do anything for a good poo story.
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What keeps me up at night? Probably most, thinking about the future for my kids. It sounds kind of funny, but not so much what they're going to do, but how as a parent, how my wife and I as parents, how best we should prepare them for the world. And I know everybody does this, I think everybody stays up at night thinking about the best thing for their kids, and astronauts are no different.
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It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.
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When humor can be made to alternate with melancholy, one has a success, but when the same things are funny and melancholic at the same time, it's just wonderful.
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If you have intercourse you run the risk of dying and the ramifications of death are final.
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When I die, I want it to say 'Short and Funny' on my tombstone.
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If anyone knew where they were, I'd send the ISDBB (Incredibly Stupid and Dumb Beyond Belief) award to the two guys who tried to break in to the Ohio penitentiary.
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With a sketch show, it's "a bunch of people and they're being funny." In a way that you can't really explain it.
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I do see things that are funny on the net. I Googled myself the other day and found out that I was worth $250m, and that I was the highest-paid guy in show business! I wish so hard it was true. It is, of course, the complete opposite. I'm neither rich nor do I make a lot of money.
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Fans feel they know me, so they want me to be on-the-spot funny, and it's hard to fulfil their expectations.
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You know, funny is this weird word for me. I hear is so many times it has no meaning anymore.
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I've never gotten to do romantic comedy like most of the girls. Maybe because I'm fit, people assume that I'm not funny?
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Meanwhile back at mama's.The porch light's on, come in if you wanna.Supper's on the stove and beer's in the fridge.Red sun sinkin' out low on the ridge.Games on the tube and daddy smokes cigarettes.Whiskey keeps his whistle wet.Funny the things you thought you'd never miss.In a world gone crazy as this.
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It's a funny thing because you look at the careers of other filmmakers, and you see them sort of slow down, and you realize, maybe this becomes harder to do as you get older. That's sort of a cautionary thing. I hope it doesn't happen to me.
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You have to be very cautious that you're hitting the right beats and making sure it's funny, but at the same time when those notes are serious, you're trying to get your point across and it's not about the comedy.
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When I was in New York, I got to see Joan Rivers do an hour of material, and it blew my mind. I don't remember how old she was at the time, but she just had this edgy hour that had so much funny stuff in it, and she was so fearless. If you only watch her on the red carpet, you don't get a sense of what a legendary standup comedian she is.
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The two things in the world we all share in this world are laughter and pain. We've all got problems. The levels of those problems vary, but we've all got problems. When you can take things that are painful and make them funny, that's a gift - to you and your audience.
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My whole family can talk. They are all car salesmen. They are all funny.
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The funny thing is that I had never actually watched TV.
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It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.
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If Madonna ran off crying that would be very funny though, heheheh!
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Greg Berlanti, David Nutter, Andrew Kreisberg and Marc Guggenheim are the people I wanted to work with. They're smart, they're funny, they're cool, they're edgy.
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When I was right out of college, I felt competitive with some of the guys in my class over career stuff. It's funny now to think about it - that a friend getting a job or something had anything to do with me... I think that my relationship with my wife has played a pivotal role in the chilling out of Aaron.
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I really wanted to find a piano for the farm house. There were so many free pianos on Craigslist, I thought, 'Let's get as many free pianos as we can and stick them all in the barn.' I got eight in a short period of time, only six of which were tunable, but it's still quite funny.
