Ass Quotes
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Critics must excuse me if I compare them to certain animals called asses, who, by gnawing vines, originally taught the great advantage of pruning them.
William Shenstone
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You beef wit me, I'm-a even the score equally. Take you on Jerry Springer and beat your ass legally.
Marshall Bruce Mathers III
Bad Meets Evil'
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You dull ass will not mend his pace with beating.
William Shakespeare
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That's not news! When a shark comes out of the water, walks into a 7-11, and bites you in the ass, then it's news!
Carlos Mencia
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I'm a wealthy man now. I've got a flat, a car, I have enough money to buy food. I skate to make the people happy. If somebody skates to earn money, I don't care. I skate for the people. Besides, it's pleasant to supply Russia with gold medals.
Evgeni Plushenko
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Whether you sniff it smoke it eat it or shove it up your ass the result is the same: addiction.
William S. Burroughs
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You can never look that tough in glasses. ... You never see somebody push up their glasses and say, "I'm gonna kick your ass."
Jim Gaffigan
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I'm a perfectionist. It's a big pain in the ass and it takes a lot of my time, but it really is going well and I have to do my own things.
George Michael
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I had a professor one time... He said, 'Class, you will forget almost everything I will teach you in here, so please remember this: that God spoke to Balaam through his ass, and He has been speaking through asses ever since. So, if God should choose to speak through you, you need not think too highly of yourself. And, if on meeting someone, right away you recognize what they are, listen to them anyway'.
Rich Mullins
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Don't be a jerk to other comics and don't let the business beat you down, stay positive and if you work your ass off you're going to get somewhere.
Bill Burr
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Once I knew the depth where no hope was and darkness lay on the face of all things. Then love came and set my soul free.
Helen Keller
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We can't all be stars; we can't all be leaders. We are all God's creatures, living life, and we have that God light in us and we're supposed to let it shine. And not everybody wants to be like me and stick their neck out to get up on stage and perform. There are those like me, but there are also those that are of a shyer nature. And they're smarter than most of us that are out there showing our asses.
Dolly Parton
