Joseph Heller Quotes
The smartest people in Washington are the political reporters. They write about their inferiors.
Quotes to Explore
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Most people don't really like to pose. It is difficult to get them to be present and relaxed under this kind of molecular scrutiny. I want them to understand I'm not simply painting them: I am painting them within a precise moment in time, as a shadow moves across their eyebrows. Then it is gone. The moment is over.
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I'm planning to be here forever, but I know at some point I'll probably have to give it up. If you live to 100, there's a very good chance you'll live forever. Because very few people die after 100.
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Never lose sight of the fact that the most important yardstick of your success will be how you treat other people - your family, friends, and coworkers, and even strangers you meet along the way.
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My dad doesn't get any of my jokes. He laughs at them, but he doesn't understand them. He's just laughing because people around him are laughing.
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When you go out of your country and meet people, you get a wider perspective.
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In the end, it's a good investment for America to be involved in helping people get democratic governance - not to take over their country - but to help people be free. And that is an investment that will pay off in the future.
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States are like people. They do not question the awful status quo until some dramatic event overturns the conventional and lax way of thinking.
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I don't necessarily set out to teach or say anything in particular in my writing. Morals and themes come out as I'm telling the tale.
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Magically turning people's old scalar contexts into list contexts is a recipe for several kinds of disaster.
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The people who have sufficient passion for the truth to give the truth a chance to prevail, if it runs counter to their bias, are in a minority. How important is this 'minority?' It is difficult to say at this point, for, at the present time their influence on governmental decisions is not perceptible.
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I hope the wonder of what happens to my characters never goes away. That yearning keeps me writing.
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Some people are near- or farsighted - I'm thorn-sighted. The thorns on the rose are in really sharp definition for me, the rose petals a little fuzzier.
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A few years ago, I lost 30 pounds, and people still wanted to criticize. And honestly, I'm happy with myself if I'm a little heavier.
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Probably like a lot of people, my personal politics are all over the map.
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Honestly, this face of mine will always be familiar to people. It's that unique quality, man. If it's a dark and crowded room, people are just able to point me out. I think I'll always be famous. I just hope I don't become infamous.
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I will say you could always look at 'Looney Tunes' and learn about writing. I think you can learn a lot about the beats of comedy. I think you can find out about awkward pauses, because I think they did those well.
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There are reasons people seek escape in books, and one of those reasons is that the boundary of what can happen is beyond what we do - or would want to see in real life.
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People remain unknowable to us, even people that we're very close to. And I think the same goes for our own selves.
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It sounds like I'm joking when I say it, but when I wrote 'Take Me To Church' and a lot of these things, I didn't think they would be hits. I thought I was writing for a potentially smaller audience.
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I like hearing the sort of harmonies people get into in different parts of the world. I love music that has a sense of allure to it, and exotic tunes. That's what I'm drawn to.
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No man should ever lose sleep over public affairs.
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This is every cook's opinion - no savory dish without an onion, but lest your kissing should be spoiled your onions must be fully boiled.
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You don't know when you're being watched. That's one of the weird things about celebrity. It's my least favorite part of acting, celebrity.
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The smartest people in Washington are the political reporters. They write about their inferiors.
