Scott Adams Quotes
-
You might think the word "homemade" is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.
-
Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
-
Good ideas have no value because the world already has too many of them. The market rewards execution, not ideas.
-
Always remember that as long as other people are gullible, there's no limit to what you can achieve.
-
I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.
-
I would sometimes sit in a crowded restaurant, and say, 'You know, I'm the only person in this restaurant who can't draw.'
-
Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.
-
There's no such thing as good ideas and bad ideas. There are only your own ideas and other people's. If you want someone to like your idea, tell him he said it first last week and you just remembered it.
-
He changed more times than a baby in a beer-drinking contest.
-
I'm not happy on vacation. In those rare times when I have three hours with no work I have to do, I'm terribly uncomfortable.
-
If our mushrooms make you hallucinate, please inform us immediately so we can overcharge you.
-
Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
-
I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have the ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.
-
I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else.
-
If you think it's easy to write jokes about fried calamari, you've probably never tried.
-
I should have written that down. - Dilbert
-
I hated my work. It never seemed to me to be what I should be doing.
-
The best way to compile inaccurate information that no one wants is to make it up.
-
Failure is a resource that can be managed.
-
Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.