Scott Adams Quotes
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In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It’s called Karoshi. I don’t want that to happen to anybody in my department. The trick is to take a break as soon as you see a bright light and hear dead relatives beckon.
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You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.
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Great minds don't think alike. If they did, the Patent Office would only have about fifty inventions.
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Technology will definitely solve all our problems, but in the process it will create brand new ones. But that's O.K. because the most you can expect from life is to get to solve better and better problems.
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I wish I were dumber so I could be more certain about my opinions. It looks fun.
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Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.
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The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers.
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If you work in the city long enough, it begins to deal with you on a personal level. Streets reveal their moods. Sometimes the signal light loves you. Sometimes they fight you. When you're hunting for a new building, you hope the city is on your side. You have to use a little bit of thinking--you might call it the process of elimination--and you need a little bit of instinct, but not too much of either. If you think too hard, you overshoot your target and end up at the Pier or the Tenderloin. If you relax and let the city help, the destination does all the work for you.
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The only risk of failure is promotion.
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I try to manage my day by my circadian rhythms because the creativity is such an elusive thing, and I could easily just stomp over it doing my administrative stuff.
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You might argue that my example is bad because Einstein is dead. But according to physicist Erwin Schrodinger, Einstein is neither dead nor alive until we dig him up and open the casket. If he's alive, he might want his brain back, which I understand is in a Ziplock bag in some guy's freezer. And this is a perfect example of why examples always distract from the main point.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays.
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I try to avoid giving advice.
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You already barely exist. Disappearing entirely won't be that much of a change.
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The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out.
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The Dilbert Principle: People are idiots.
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One way to compensate for a tiny brain is to pretend to be dead.
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Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.
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Highly intelligent and well-informed people disagree on every political issue. Therefore, intelligence and knowledge are useless for making decisions, because if any of that stuff helped, then all the smart people would have the same opinions. So use your "gut instinct" to make voting choices. That is exactly like being clueless, but with the added advantage that you'll feel as if your random vote preserved democracy.
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The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day. This is why people of different religions can generally live in peace. At some level, we all suspect that other people don't believe their own religion any more than we believe ours.
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I used to be stupid but I've turned that situation around 360 degrees.
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If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
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I'm curious how you'll know it works. I assume it's mostly a cosmetic change.