Mae West Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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What's great about stand-up is that you can say whatever you want and go around the country, and sometimes the world, and work on it and see how people react. You don't need Standards & Practices or notes from lawyers or producers to tell you what's funny.
Natasha Leggero -
I'd imagine my wedding as a fairy tale... huge, beautiful and white.
Paris Hilton -
A mate of mine told me recently, 'It's the first time I've seen you work, Worthington.' I thought that was quite funny, but he was right.
Sam Worthington -
I did accents and funny voices for the family when I was growing up.
Lake Bell -
My voice is distinctive: there's a rhythm to it, and also, it's funny. I was just blessed with a funny-sounding voice.
Wanda Sykes -
I have an unfortunate personality.
Orson Welles
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Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
Abraham Lincoln -
We try to make the name longer and longer every year. First, it was 'Larry the Cable Guy's Christmas Spectacular.' Then it was 'It's a Very Larry Christmas.' Now it's 'Larry the Cable Guy's Hula-palooza Christmas Luau.' I'll tell you what it is: It's funny. That's what it is. Who cares what the name of it is? It is a funny special.
Larry the Cable Guy -
Being a humorist is not a voluntary thing. You can tell this because in a situation where saying a funny thing will cause a lot of trouble, a humorist will still say the funny thing. No matter how inappropriate.
P. J. O'Rourke -
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
Abraham Lincoln -
I like children - fried.
W. C. Fields -
I got tired of books where the boy is a bit thick and the girl's very clever. Why does it have to such an opposition? Why can't they be like the girls and boys that I know personally, who are equally funny and equally cross? Who get things equally wrong and are equally brave? And make the same mistakes?
Patrick Ness
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Diabetes occurs at twice the rate in the African American community as it does in white Americans.
Xavier Becerra -
I was extremely lucky that I had two great wives. It sounds a bit funny to say that, but it's absolutely true.
Edmund Hillary -
Being funny is a symptom of what's underneath. You're pumping out all that energy because something else is going on inside you, some opposing force, something uncomfortable.
Faith Prince -
I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.
Eddie Izzard -
I think things are funny when the character is taking it totally seriously.
Rachel Weisz -
When no one knew who Dana White was... Dana White used to run around with me, hang out with me, and I treated him just like anyone else in my camp.
Floyd Mayweather, Jr.
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It's just funny that Americans have to contend with 2000 channels, and 60 different specific news sources, and the confusion that it creates, and the junk that we get to see is hilarious.
Adam McKay -
I realized with Broadway everything written for black people is usually written in the past, and I'm kind of a contemporary guy. I don't think you want to see me in 'Raisin in the Sun'.
Chris Rock -
My job as a surgeon is not just to fix a joint, but to give my patients the encouragement and tools they need to speed up their recovery and leave my clinic better than they have been in years.
Kevin R. Stone -
The greatest adventure is what lies ahead.
J. R. R. Tolkien -
I've always envied girls having Ugg boots, so when I found some for men, I had to have them.
Marc Warren -
I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
Mae West