Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it's the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
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In love, first please the eye, then win the heart.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.
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In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That's what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn't have a stupid opinion about it.
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In terms of merit, sports has mathematical statistics. That's how you know who the best player is.
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A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others.
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All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
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There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
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Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
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None seem to bear the imputation of supposed guilt with greater intolerance than such as are, on other occasions, obviously culpable of vice or crime.
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It is the folly of weak-minded people, to imagine they are what flattery or conceit represents them; and that it is useless for them to be what they are not, since they seem already to have acquired the reputation of it.
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They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it.
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The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.