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I have a little bit of an out-of-body experience where I enjoy the scenario, and I really do like seeing a crowd turn into a mob, and I do nothing to stop it. People can become really dangerous.
Norm MacDonald -
He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
Norm MacDonald
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If you watch that show and you didn't know it was called Seinfeld, you'd think it was called 'The George Costanza Show'.
Norm MacDonald -
It is better to be idle than employed in ill.
Norm MacDonald -
They that are virtuous from principle may receive confidence in every capacity; but they that are so from custom or habit, are capable of trust only in matters of ordinary and settled occurrence.
Norm MacDonald -
I don't have to meet actors. I'm really blessed that I don't have to do all that horseshit.
Norm MacDonald -
There hasn't been an original voice in stand-up since Sam Kinison.
Norm MacDonald -
I can't be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I'll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
Norm MacDonald
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The man that does not fear punishment, little regards crime.
Norm MacDonald -
Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter's moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
Norm MacDonald -
My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died.
Norm MacDonald -
I like doing a funny show where I don't have to act and fall in love with a girl.
Norm MacDonald -
During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.
Norm MacDonald -
I tried to make the punchline as close to the setup as I could. And I thought that was the perfect thing. If I could make the setup and the punchline identical to each other, I would create a different kind of joke.
Norm MacDonald
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
Norm MacDonald -
I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
Norm MacDonald -
Most men appear wiser in their doubts than in their belief.
Norm MacDonald -
Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
Norm MacDonald -
Few criminals die sensible of their crimes.
Norm MacDonald -
A lot of people think I'm difficult to work with. It's not like I really want to do that much stuff, so it doesn't really matter. I guess I'm somewhat difficult when it comes to comedy.
Norm MacDonald
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All kinds of violence on the TV. You're not supposed to watch violence on the TV. Children, they can't watch it 'cause they're afraid maybe the kids will copy something they see on the TV. I can't even get a funny cartoon anymore because some 12-year-old somewhere watched a particularly violent episode of the Road Runner-Coyote show, and the next day, they found him at the bottom of a canyon, two giant springs strapped to his feet.
Norm MacDonald -
Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
Norm MacDonald -
The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
Norm MacDonald -
The only two TV shows I saw do that, where they don't warm them up and you can really bomb, was Saturday Night Live - and that's why it gets a lot of heat, too. Obviously it gets criticism fairly, too. But a lot of it is because Lorne Michaels lets the audience decide and doesn't force them to laugh.
Norm MacDonald