Brett Gelman Quotes

I've never gone to a bachelor party, where I didn't, no matter how much I loved the people there, hate them so much for their disgusting behavior.

Brett Gelman

• People
• Behavior
• Bachelor party

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Quotes to Explore

• I think most families have a few secrets or some strange aspect to their history. We're all fascinated by family dynamics, but I'd much rather sit in an audience and watch someone else's problems!

  

  Ed Harris
  • Family
  • History
  • Problems

• One hazard of our job on TV is people are always checking us out and noting every pound we've gained or haven't quite lost.

  

  Natalie Morales
  • People
  • Job
  • Lost

• I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock 'n' roll and ex-wives. In that order.

  

  Sam Kinison
  • Rock
  • Jesus
  • Roll

• Broader social concerns within Muslim communities, such as discrimination, integration or socio-economic disadvantages, should be treated distinctively and not as part of counterterrorism agenda, which has been counter-productive.

  

  Maajid Nawaz
  • Discrimination
  • Agenda

• Writing is just very difficult. I'm an adequate performer. And I think I have a special talent as an editor. Editing is what I do best.

  

  Ira Glass
  • Writing
  • Best
  • Talent

• It is not productive to see things in simple black and white, and talk in either anti-nuclear or pro-nuclear terms.

  

  Yoshihiko Noda
  • Black
  • Simple
  • Black-and-white

• Investment in training is a huge necessity for knowledge-based corporations.

  

  N. R. Narayana Murthy
  • Knowledge
  • Training
  • Investment

• My looks vary, but I definitely think about it and plan. I like to shop, too, so I'm always mixing it up. But normally, I'll be wearing something like a college T-shirt and a sweater, something like that. But I definitely have to plan.

  

  J. R. Smith
  • Up
  • Think
  • College

• If you're comfortable with yourself, then you'll look beautiful. If you're not feeling comfortable with yourself, than that kind of shows. I think that as cheesy as the pageant industry can be seen at times, it actually does help women - boosting their confidence and growing into their own. I have to give it credit for that.

  

  Olivia Culpo
  • Women
  • Help
  • Beautiful

• In the one defence, briefly, we accept responsibility but deny that it was bad: in the other, we admit that it was bad but don't accept full, or even any, responsibility.

  

  J. L. Austin
  • Bad
  • Responsibility
  • Admit

• On that show, I did country and some rock, too, whatever record I had out at the time, I'd sing that.

  

  Wanda Jackson
  • Time
  • Country
  • Rock

• While it is often true that the enemy of my enemy is my friend, it seems like Yahoo's almost obsessive focus on Google is taking away from its other businesses.

  

  Kara Swisher
  • True
  • Friend
  • Focus

• I didn't get why I was wearing a mask. But I understand it now - why my dad would want our face to be covered.

  

  Paris Jackson
  • Why
  • Want
  • Dad

• My wife and I try not to get into each other's work too much.

  

  Patrick Dempsey
  • Work
  • Wife
  • Try

• I don't carry the burden of the past or the madness of the future. I live in the present.

  

  Narendra Modi
  • Live
  • Future
  • Past

• Camped on a tropic riverside,One day he missed his loving bride.She had, the guide informed him later,Been eaten by an alligator.Professor Twist could not but smile.'You mean,' he said, 'a crocodile.'

  

  Ogden Nash
  • She
  • Smile

• I met Taylor Lautner and Jonah Hill at the 'Today Show.' That was pretty cool.

  

  Lexi Thompson
  • Today
  • Pretty
  • Cool

• I feel like the expectations have gone up. It's not a complaint, but it's a little intimidating. People are like, 'Oh, you're on Matador. It's kind of a legendary label - you're going to have to live up to all those other bands.' I guess it's not that explicit.

  

  Lucy Dacus
  • People
  • Up
  • Live

• I think that if you keep banging at the door all you need is a little foothold, a little tiny foothold, and then the rest will take care of itself.

  

  Branford Marsalis
  • Rest
  • Door

• America was first colonized by Puritans. Most of our earliest immigrants, and many since, have come here in order to practice their religious beliefs as they please. Our culture has always been, and will most likely always be, profoundly influenced by religion.

  

  James Frey
  • America
  • Culture
  • Religious

• Soul is when you take a song and make it a part of you - a part that's so true, so real, people think it must have happened to you. … It's like electricity - we don't really know what it is, do we? But it's a force that can light a room. Soul is like electricity, like a spirit, a drive, a power.

  

  Ray Charles
  • People
  • Real
  • Power

• People love stories. They need stories.

  

  Caroline Leavitt
  • People

• I'm trying to encourage more women to be themselves, rather than what men want them to be. I don't believe in patronizing either sex.

  

  Wendy O. Williams
  • Believe
  • Men
  • Women

• I've never gone to a bachelor party, where I didn't, no matter how much I loved the people there, hate them so much for their disgusting behavior.

  

  Brett Gelman
  • People
  • Behavior
  • Bachelor party