Conan O'Brien Quotes
Tomorrow night President Obama will announce his new immigration plan. Obama's favorite part of his new immigration plan is that he gets to emigrate to another country. He's tired of all this.

Quotes to Explore
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One must realise his Self in order to open the store of unalloyed happiness.
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Nevertheless, there is another threat on the horizon. I see this threat in environmentalism which is becoming a new dominant ideology, if not a religion. Its main weapon is raising the alarm and predicting the human life endangering climate change based on man-made global warming.
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Do not tell somebody how to vote, just go up to them and tell them what Fahrenheit 9/11 meant to you. Fahrenheit will probably not win an Academy Award, but if you put it first on your list, it will become a nominee.
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Israel, in general, should learn from other nations. We have a tendency to teach the world. In many cases, we should learn from the world, because they make advances.
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Right now I'm so old that if I had a big gush of money, I don't know what I'd do with it. I don't travel anymore. I don't need anything, don't want anything. I'd give it to my son, I guess, and let him enjoy it.
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One thing you can't intend is how you will be read. I hear it said a lot that my books are about the 'search for identity', and this is said admiringly, as if I meant to encourage such a search.
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I hardly ever write when I'm just feeling great.
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While I was busy hating Vegas, and hiding from Vegas, a funny thing happened. I grew to love Vegas.
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I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.
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We're not really under pressure to deliver a cloned baby to this world. What we are under pressure to do is to deliver a cloned baby that is a healthy one.
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To me, being in your prime means playing your best and feeling your best, too.
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Some of those men in power, we just have to change their faces because we're not going to change their minds.
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I have a strange relationship with influences because mine are mostly literary or painters or poets, who I'll even quote. I don't do tributes to cinema.
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If Iraq had succeeded in spray-drying anthrax spores to extend their life and lethality, that would have been among the most important secrets of its wide-ranging weapons program.
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It's always been a lie that it's difficult to make films.
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You can't second-guess yourself as a filmmaker.
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The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.
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How do you grow up in the shadow of a guy - I want to talk about the movie in a second - but how do you grow up in the shadow of a guy who really is a legend in his own time?
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When it's low-budget, and you have one other person on the set, you have to make rules.
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I am glad that our country is starting to have a serious conversation about how to repair our broken immigration system - it is long overdue.
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Over the years, the diamond industry has had a devastating impact in countries such as Sierra Leone, Angola and the Congo, where profits from the sale of diamonds have been used to fund brutal wars, with disastrous effects on local communities.
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I prefer design by experts - by people who know what they are doing.
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The eyes of that species of extinct giant, whose bones fill the mounds of America, have gazed on Niagara as our eyes do now.
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Tomorrow night President Obama will announce his new immigration plan. Obama's favorite part of his new immigration plan is that he gets to emigrate to another country. He's tired of all this.