Jokes Quotes
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I don't really write jokes. I wait for stuff to happen in life, and then I tell it on stage.
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If sex isn't a joke, what is it?
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What I say is stupid. Who takes a comedian seriously? I'm doing sophisticated knock-knock jokes.
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It's hard to program a computer to make jokes. The brain needs to do something here; the brain needs to come up with something bizarre to make something funny.
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The Australian sense of humor is very dry, sarcastic, and very undercover. Like if I tell any jokes in America, people just think I'm serious! So I just quit telling any jokes whatsoever.
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I make jokes. That's what I do.
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If you think it's easy to write jokes about fried calamari, you've probably never tried.
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Once you've heard the joke, it's not funny anymore, but it's the way it's told. And I think that's the same with the music: The reason some of my songs have lasted longer is there's a lot of stuff packed in there. You want to hear them more than once.
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Life is a cruel, horrible joke and I am the punch line.
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It was weird at first but then it was kind of fun. I was just laughing and cracking jokes, being a cheerleader.
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I actually credit Twitter with fine-tuning some joke-writing skills. I still feel like I'm working at it.
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It is almost a joke, but a joke that nobody tells.
