Jokes Quotes
-
Can anything be more disgusting than to hear people called 'educated' making small jokes about eating ham, and showing themselves empty of any real knowledge as to the relation of their own social and religious life to the history of the people they think themselves witty in insulting? The best thing that can be said of it is, that it is a sign of the intellectual narrowness—in plain English, the stupidity which is still the average mark of our culture.
George Eliot
-
But she took her husband's jokes and joviality as patiently as everything else, considering that "men would be so", and viewing the stronger sex in the light of animals whom it had pleased Heaven to make naturally troublesome, like bulls and turkey-cocks.
George Eliot
-
I just do my act. If people in England don't get my joke I make fun of myself for telling it.
Bill Burr
-
You throw a perfectly straight line at the audience and then, right at the end, you curve it. Good jokes do that.
Abe Burrows
-
It's interesting, once I have convinced people that, yes, I have a sister with a mental disability, the retard jokes really dry up, so I'm not sure how much retard humor is really going on out there, but I imagine there's a lot because it's a pretty safe group to make fun of. It's not like the Retards of America are gonna rise up and organize a protest. They're not gonna write letters. They only just recently got the Supreme Court to stop executing them.
Bonnie McFarlane
-
My friends joke because I will take my clothes off, at the drop of a hat.
James Cromwell
-
I don't do too many jokes about current affairs, because almost every comedian always does that.
Bruce Bruce
-
I actually write some pretty tough jokes. I don't want to push the "soft" angle too much.
Allison Silverman
-
As long as I could hold a pencil, I was drawing and telling stories and making jokes. I've just been lucky that no one ever stopped me, and now I can do that for a living.
Alex Hirsch
-
I'm always looking at new ways to tell a joke so that it doesn't get stale while working on new jokes every night or I would go absolutely crazy and would want to kill myself. I just want to go in there and talk about what's bugging me.
Bill Burr
-
Now, I want to explain something to you guys. I don't have an ending joke, because I don't tell jokes. I tell real-life stories and make them funny. So, I'm not like the average comedian. They have an ending joke; they always holler Peace! I'm out of here, and walk off stage. So, basically, when I get through performing on stage, I just walk off.
Bruce Bruce
-
There are things you do when you're writing that are so fun to do it's almost like they're private jokes that are amusing to you but no one else is going to enjoy them nearly as much and you worry you're going to have to take them out in the end.
Chad Harbach
-
I don't really like jokes in a way. I mean gags are fine but I like weird moments where what you have isn't really a joke, just tiny moments.
Noel Fielding
-
Never, never tell jokes about a man with easy access to weapons of mass destruction.
Peter Chernin
-
Any excuse to live in New York and do art. Has to be one of the most rewarding experiences in the world.
Tommy Chong
-
It seems to me that romantic comedies used to be about falling in love, but in recent years they've really become just comedies where the love story is only there as a spine to hang the jokes on.
Nigel Cole
-
A man assumes that a woman's refusal is just part of a game. Or, at any rate, a lot of men assume that. When a man says no, it's no. When a woman says no, it's yes, or at least maybe. There is even a joke to that effect. And little by little, women begin to believe in this view of themselves.
Erica Jong
-
In Bengal, Hindus are known to crack jokes at the expense of their gods and goddesses and that's what I did.
Sunil Gangopadhyay
