Comedian Quotes

• For aspiring comedians? Don't listen to me. Just go on stage and do what you think is funny.

  

  Bill Burr
  • Stage
  • Comedian

• When I was a teenager, I met a comedian who I admired, and he was very rude to me. That's why when people come up to me I try not to be rude. I don't want to name who he is, but it really put me off watching his stuff since.

  

  Stephen Merchant
  • Rude
  • Watching
  • Comedian

• I think it go serious in college when I found out I really enjoyed making people laugh. It makes me happy. I said, I wanna be a comedian, I wanna get good.' You're not good in the beginning. You're still trying to figure out what the things are that you are going to talk about, what your angle is going to be and there's a lot of trial and error. I just never gave up and that was the beginning of my career. Just experimenting, trying it out and falling in love with it.

  

  Bill Bellamy
  • Laugh
  • Enjoyed
  • Falling In Love

• I think, first of all, you need to love what you're doing, and then this helps in the comedian for its part in everything - but the moment you enjoy what you're doing, you try to express yourself, to find your way, and every time is different, of course.

  

  Cecilia Bartoli
  • Different
  • Trying
  • Moments

• I just think of myself as a comedian, really.

  

  Sarah Silverman
  • Comedian

• I keep going because if you stop, you stop. Why retire? Inspire.

  

  Mickey Rooney
  • inspirational
  • Retiring
  • Stopping

• Awards mean nothing to comedians. What matters is the audience, how you're doing - artistically, for the most part - at that moment.

  

  Steve Martin
  • Mean
  • Moments
  • Audience

• It would be great to be able to follow in the footsteps of Bill Murray. I really respect his ability as a comedian, obviously, but even more so as an actor.

  

  Will Ferrell
  • Ability
  • Comedian
  • Footsteps

• I think for comedians, acting is their natural progression. It's all about progression.

  

  Russell Peters
  • Acting
  • Comedian
  • Progression

• I don't think comedians make an active decision to be a certain "persona." Comedians write the way they're going to write.

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Thinking
  • Writing
  • Decision

• The bad thing about being a famous comedian is that every now and then someone approaches me to tell an old joke. Don't tell me jokes - I have that. People also say the weirdest things, sometimes sarcastic things, and even evil things. They like to provoke to get a reaction.

  

  Robin Williams
  • Bad
  • Famous
  • Someone

• My greatest hope was to get discovered as a comedian and get on a sitcom.

  

  Steve Buscemi
  • Hope
  • Discovered
  • Comedian

• I wasn't the good looking guy, I wasn't the hot chick, I wasn't the fat guy, I didn't have a catchphrase, I didn't wear a silly hat. I was just trying to improve as a comedian.

  

  Bill Burr
  • Trying
  • Guy
  • Silly

• I spent 25 years as a stand-up comedian.

  

  Steven Michael Quezadaun
  • Years
  • Comedian
  • Standup

• I'm not a comedian. I'm not a show host. I'm a musician. That's why I've turned down offers to host the Grammy Awards and the American Music Awards. Is it really entertaining for me to get up there and crack a few weak jokes and force people to laugh because I'm Michael Jackson, when I know in my heart that I'm not funny?

  

  Michael Jackson
  • Musician
  • Comedian
  • Show host

• Even when you hear about a comedian getting married, among comedians, we're always kind of like, what are they doing?

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Kind
  • Married
  • Comedian

• I knew I wanted to be a performer and do comedy at 5 years old. My dad's wife, Marlene Rosenbaum, was boiling water and she goes, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I said, "A comedian." And she laughed and laughed because she thought that was the cutest, funniest thing.

  

  Sandra Bernhard
  • Dad
  • Comedy
  • Wife

• I don't consider myself a comedian because I don't really concern myself too much with jokes.

  

  Paul Rudd
  • Jokes
  • Concern
  • Comedian

• Rick Shapiro is a top comedian.

  

  Howard Stern
  • Comedian

• A comedian is simply a different kind of therapist. A comedian is a psychologist and a psychiatrist rolled into one. Except I can't prescribe medicine. (You still need a doctorate, which is bullshit.) Okay, so I'm not like a psychiatrist. Fine. But I'm still like a psychologist (except I can't diagnose or treat mental illness).

  

  Eugene Mirman
  • Illness
  • Psychologist
  • Therapist

• Whatever happens in life can happen on the stage, but as a comedian you should always be clear what your target is. It's fine to be gratuitously tasteless if that's what you are intending to do. It's that old line: I don't defend what a comedian might say but I defend to the death his right to say it.

  

  Ben Miller
  • Death
  • Stage
  • Target

• I think a comedian has to be low status on some level; that gives you the right to do all sorts of jokes about all sorts of different kinds of people.

  

  Stewart Lee
  • Jokes
  • Comedian
  • Status

• I mostly want to highlight things that feel like an injustice, and that's not really political. No one is going to - or should - say that bigotry toward Muslims is partisan. It's a matter of being just or not being just. So that's why I started calling myself a social justice comedian.

  

  Negin Farsad
  • Justice
  • Comedian
  • Calling

• I love standup comedians. I really do.

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Comedian
  • Standup

1

...

5

6

7

8

9

previous

next