Funny Quotes
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What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a marketing meeting somewhere, 'Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.'
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Life is always walking up to us and saying, "Come on in, the living's fine," and what do we do? Back off and take its picture.
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Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
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Since I became more confident, I've thought, 'Right, let me get myself on the market'. So I joined Tinder and Chappie, and it was funny because, at first, the sites thought I was an imposter.
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Some of the best fiction writers got their start writing airline menus.
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I was trampled to death by a man who believed his luggage would be the first piece off. If he were an experienced traveler, he would know that the first piece of luggage belongs to no one. It's just a dummy suitcase to give everyone hope.
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That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year.
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It's easy to be negatively funny about personalities in the media. It's just kind of a cheap laugh.
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I'm a bitter, sad, sour young man who makes a career out of hastling people with real careers.
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You might want to put this in the back of your craw and think about it.
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If I'm in a serious play, I often think to myself, 'I could make that line funny.'
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When you start out, it sometimes feels like you're fighting audiences every night just to prove that you're funny.
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When we shot that Westworld, it was so funny. Not funny - I mean, like, funny-strange because I, personally as an actress and as a person, am so used to having to play the damsel, that when we were shooting that scene, and Jimmi looked at me and said, "Dolores, run," I ran. Then I stopped myself, and I turned around and I went, "Oh my God. I'm so used to running."
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I am who I am and I say what I think. I'm not putting a face on for the record.
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I can be educational, but if I'm not funny and entertaining, too, who's going to come and listen to me or watch me on TV.
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No volleyball play can begin without a serve, and the serve is the only technique that is totally under your control. In other endeavors, you cannot succeed without believing in yourself, and that belief is completely under your control.
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I admit to spending a fortune on women, booze and gambling... the rest I spend foolishly.
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The funny thing about the boy who gave away his loaves and fish is that he, too, ended the day with a full stomach.
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As long as the wrong feels right - it's like I'm in flight.
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I knew exactly what to do on Alien, it was funny.
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And there's no damage to the car. Except to the car itself.
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That big guy, Winfield, at 6'6", can do things only a small man can do.
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Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullshit before.
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Physically I'm not as strong as I was, but I try to make up for it mentally. It's a big challenge, and I relish it, competing with guys half my age.
