Funny Quotes
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Private Perkins is a funny little codger.
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First of all, I choose the great roles, and if none of these come, I choose the mediocre ones, and if they don't come, I choose the ones that pay the rent.
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The last time Pena faced the Padres, the Dodgers scratched for a run to tie the game and then went on to win 4-0.
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I'm funny because I'm funny. And there's more to offer.
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A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. "What shall we name the other one?" I smiled. She was not amused.
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Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
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It's a base hit on the error by Roberts.
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As humourless a lump of dough as ever held a torchlight vigil outside the South African Embassy or stuck an AIDS awareness ribbon on an unwilling first-nighter.
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The fact that Americans drag around the world by the busloads to glimpse the past probably has something to do with the youth of our country. We revere anything older than George Burns.
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The funny thing about the boy who gave away his loaves and fish is that he, too, ended the day with a full stomach.
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Houston has its largest crowd of the night here this evening.
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I have lost friends, some by death...others by sheer inability to cross the street.
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All the Padres need is a fly ball in the air.
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You might want to put this in the back of your craw and think about it.
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It's funny how the present can change the past.
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Some of the best fiction writers got their start writing airline menus.
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Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullshit before.
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People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.
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That big guy, Winfield, at 6'6", can do things only a small man can do.
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It is easy to forget that the most important aspect of comedy, after all, its great saving grace, is its ambiguity. You can simultaneously laugh at a situation, and take it seriously.
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Since I became more confident, I've thought, 'Right, let me get myself on the market'. So I joined Tinder and Chappie, and it was funny because, at first, the sites thought I was an imposter.
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When we shot that Westworld, it was so funny. Not funny - I mean, like, funny-strange because I, personally as an actress and as a person, am so used to having to play the damsel, that when we were shooting that scene, and Jimmi looked at me and said, "Dolores, run," I ran. Then I stopped myself, and I turned around and I went, "Oh my God. I'm so used to running."
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Hats off to drug abusers everywhere.
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That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year.
