Funny Quotes
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A policeman stopped me and said: Would you please blow into this bag, sir? I said: What for, officer? He said: My chips are too hot.
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Well, it's funny because, "The Green Leaves of Summer" and "The Alamo" theme are the same thing. There's just - the Brothers Four was a different recording of it.
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FREEDLEY: Will I feel better after I take it? DR. FITCH (coldly): I, am a physician, Freedley, not an astrologer. If you want a horoscope, there's a gypsy tearoom over on Lexington Avenue.
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What's funny about Jesus' Son is that I never even wrote that book, I just wrote it down. I would tell these stories and people would say, You should write these things down.
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The funny thing is that everyone thinks I'm naturally dark because all of my siblings are, but I'm naturally dirty blond.
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The funny thing is all these school shootings that we have, always happen in very religious communities. Maybe it's because the centre of their lives is a big fat nothing and it's just a fantasy and there's nothing there. I think maybe that might have something to do with it.
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Life is funny, and that's why I celebrate it in my shows.
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Be funny on a golf course? Do I kid my best friend's mother about her heart condition?
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There's something dangerous about what's funny. Jarring and disconcerting. There is a connection between funny and scary.
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I'm always trying to find the next comedian that just gives me something a little funny to combine with all of the depressing news that I'm processing.
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I love to do comedy, and I don't think of things as drama or comedy. I think that if it's a funny line, it's a funny line. If it's a funny moment, it's a funny moment.
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I giggle when I put myself down. It's just funny to me.
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It's funny where life can take you.
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Especially with a comedy, you've got the clear cut goal of trying to make a scene funny. It's not like drama where you're trying to achieve some kind of emotion or trying to further the story along. You're trying to figure out what's the funniest way to do something.
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It's funny how dogs and cats know the inside of folks better than other folks do, isn't it?
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Kyle Baker's work is really funny, but it's also got a very clear vision.
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I'm a big fan of certain new acts. I love any genre of music, and I think it's really great to see that there are new artists coming through. It's kinda funny to think that I'm like the old man on campus now. But I'm really happy for groups like One Direction. I think they're really good guys.
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The thing that's weird is that we thought it was funny. We expected people to get the joke - that we with Andrew Ridgeley were two guys really making asses of ourselves.
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I love fashion and always have something put together, but I won't wear anything specifically to be photographed in. I have become more cautious of making funny faces in public.
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I'd rather not have a moment when I'm known for my looks; being funny and interesting lasts longer.
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It's kind of funny that I've been branded as the empathy lady when, really, what I'm doing is questioning and interrogating empathy.
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I love being a mum. Sophia is so funny and has a great personality.
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If you must make a noise, make it quietly.
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There is definitely a pressure for funny people to be funny. People want them to perform all the time.
