Dane Cook Quotes
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When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.
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No one wants to drown. Drowning would be the worst. Cause everyone knows that feeling. That feeling, oh it's the worst... when you think you're drowning.
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My nickname for my mom was 'The Compass.'
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My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.
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I have new ideas every day, and I always want to take on new challenges.
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I did stand-up comedy for seventeen years. I need to explore other things.
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I don't know if I could rebuild an airplane engine, but I know a little bit about rotors and rivets.
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I always wanted to be a snake. Every time I saw a snake on TV. I'd always say 'Why not me?'
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I had the humble beginnings. I was doing comedy in laundry mats in 1992, literally where I would bring a little gorilla amp and a lapel mike and just start performing.
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I don't have to do anything for anyone else's benefit anymore. I just want to exceed my own expectations.
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You've gotta share what's going on in your mind.
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People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
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I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.
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Christina can sing all the notes, but Britney is just hot!
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I had never done a roast, but I really wanted to, because it's so different from standup.
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I've always read books and loved human behavior since I was ten or twelve years old. Maybe even that's why I wanted to do comedy.
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When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.
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When you're on a movie set and you are hopefully making a comedy, everyone's stifling their laughter. You're looking at the crew guys, hoping someone is making that face like, and not like, this is not working out, man.
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When something's good, I'm not an over-celebrator.
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
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I am an observer, I like to watch people. I am into psychology and people - how they act and such.
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I've lived in LA for so long, I don't even know what is real and what isn't any more.
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In the year 3000, everything will be instant.
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I like fearless characters, people just not afraid to do anything it takes to make people laugh.