Humor Quotes
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Humor is the most engaging cowardice.
Robert Frost
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The game in St. Louis has been halted in the fourth inning because of rain. I'll bet they have the jacuzzis going there.
Jerry Coleman
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That's a problem I have a lot of the time with humor in music, where it just kind of stops at the obvious level of: 'Hey, isn't it something that's in bad taste?'
Oneohtrix Point Never
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Apparently sometimes my humor is dryer than a desert.
Nick Viall
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After I told my wife that black underwear turned me on, she didn't wash my Y-fronts for a month.
Chic Murray
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How do you feel, Georgie?" whispered Mrs. Weasley. George's fingers groped for the side of his head. "Saintlike," he murmured. "What's wrong with him?" croaked Fred, looking terrified. "Is his mind affected?" "Saintlike," repeated George, opening his eyes and looking up at his brother. "You see...I'm HOLEY, Fred, geddit?
Joanne Rowling
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I kinda expected to turn the bottle and see a recipe. "So that's how you make ice cubes. Apparently you just freeze this stuff. Oh, but you need a tray. That's how they trick you into it."
Jim Gaffigan
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My father was from Aberdeen, and a more generous man you couldn't wish to meet. I have a gold watch that belonged to him. He sold it to me on his deathbed. I wrote him a cheque for it, post dated of course.
Chic Murray
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There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.
Charles Dickens
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I used to smoke marijuana. But I'll tell you something: I would only smoke it in the late evening. Oh, occasionally the early evening, but usually the late evening - or the mid-evening. Just the early evening, midevening and late evening. Occasionally, early afternoon, early mid-afternoon, or perhaps the late-midafternoon. Oh, sometimes the early-mid-late-early morning. . . But never at dusk!
Steve Martin
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That home run ties it up, 1-0.
Jerry Coleman
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I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'
Tommy Cooper
