Humor Quotes
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I dreamt I was forced to eat 25lb of marshmallows. When I woke up, my pillow was missing.
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My dad has a very dry sense of humor and my mom has a more fun, silly sense of humor. My mom is the type that, at the dinner table, you'd look over at and she'd have a piece of asparagus hanging down her nose. Classic mom bit.
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Good humor, like the jaundice, makes every one of its own complexion.
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The way he's swinging the bat, he won't get a hit until the 20th century.
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There is a grim and ghastly humor -- the humor that is born of a pathetic philosophy -- which now and then strikes me in reading the bright and keen-witted work of our American paragraphers. It is a humor that may be crystallized by hunger and sorrow and tears. It is not found elsewhere as it is in America. It is out of the question in England, because an Englishman cannot poke fun at himself. He cannot joke about an empty flour-barrel. We can: especially if by doing it we may swap the joke for another barrel of flour. We can never be a nation of snobs so long as we are willing to poke fun at ourselves.
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I didn't lose my virginity until I was twenty-six. Nineteen vaginally, but twenty-six what my boyfriend calls "the real way".
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I only dated one Asian girl, but she was very Asian. She was a panda.
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You are not just a funny person or just a journalist. Most people are hybrids of having a smart opinion and a great sense of humor.
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We started with 53,000 people. Half are gone, but surprisingly, most are still here!
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Gene Richards swings, the ball bounces foul and hits him in the head. No harm done.
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When you lose your hands, you can't play baseball.
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Our thoughts are ours, their ends none of our own
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What is wanted for the nonce is, that folks should be as agreeable as possible in conversation and demeanor; so that good humor may be said to be one of the very best articles of dress one can wear in societ.
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It's off the leg and into the left field of Doug Rader.
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Those amateur umpires are certainly flexing their fangs tonight.
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Since so many people these days don't seem to start their families until around age forty, I predict there will be less child beating, but more slipped disks from lifting babies out of cribs. Even the father of advanced age who's not inclined to spare the rod is likely to suffer more than his victim: The first punch he throws might well be the last straw for his rotator cuff, reducing his disciplinary options to mere verbal abuse and napping.
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The big ballpark can do it all!
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Humor is a means of obtaining pleasure in spite of the distressing effects that interface with it.
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Jazz is musical humor. The noun jazz describes a modern American technique for the playing of any music, accompanied by noise called harmony, and interpolated instrumental effects. It also describes music exhibiting influence of that technique which has as its traditional object to secure the effects of surprise, or in the broadest sense, humor.
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Billy Almon has all of his in-laws and outlaws here this afternoon.
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There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.
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I've never seen a game like this. Every game this year has been like this.
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There is nothing like a gleam of humor to reassure you that a fellow human being is ticking inside a strange face.
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There is something to me very softening in the presence of a woman, some strange influence, even if one is not in love with them, which I cannot at all account for, having no very high opinion of the sex. But yet, I always feel in better humor with myself and every thing else, if there is a woman within ken.
