Humor Quotes
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Rich Folkers is throwing 'em up in the bullpen.
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I got up this morning. I like to get up in the morning; it gives me the rest of the day to myself. I crossed the landing and went down stairs. Mind you, if there had been no stairs, I wouldn't even have attempted it.
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A Jazz man should be saying what he feels: humor, sadness, joy... all the things that humans have.
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Billy Almon has all of his in-laws and outlaws here this afternoon.
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The sky is so clear today you can see all the way to Missouri.
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A lot of my humor does come from anger. It's like, you're not gonna pull one over on me - which is pretty much my motto anyways.
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There's a deep fly ball... Winfield goes back, back... his head hits the wall ... it's rolling towards second base.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.
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I cannot put into words how happy I was to have had the opportunity to be around him as much as I was. He had a great sense of humor, and through his humor, one could find his wisdom.
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Now don't get me wrong, I love animals, but I like eatin' 'em more... fun to pet, better to chew.
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I am a great believer that what makes our show different is the humor.
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I've made a couple of mistakes I'd like to do over.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
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I have always found humor in places where humor wasn't necessarily intended.
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Humor is the most engaging cowardice.
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I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'
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In the wise words of Mahatma Gandhi: have a sense of humor.
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Humor has been a fashioning instrument in America, cleaving its way through the national life, holding tenaciously to the spread elements of that life. Its mode has often been swift and coarse and ruthless, beyond art and beyond established civilization. It has engaged in warfare against the established heritage, against the bonds of pioneer existence. Its objective --the unconscious objective of a disunited people --has seemed to be that of creating fresh bonds, a new unity, the semblance of a society and the rounded completion of an American type.
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And Kansas City is at Chicago tonight, or is it Chicago at Kansas City? Well, no matter as Kansas City leads in the eighth 4 to 4.
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My wife went to a beauty parlor and got a mudpack; for two days she looked nice, then the mud fell off.
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With one out in the first, Dave Roberts looks a lot better than the last time he pitched against the Padres!
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You ever look for the remote control, but you can't find it, so you just decide, "Ah, guess I'm not watching TV. I'm not gonna take two steps and turn it on myself. I'll go to the gym if I'm going to work out."
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Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
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I think the Canadian sense of humor is dryer than America's and juicier than Britain's. I think it's a cross between the two of them, really.
