Funny Quotes
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I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes, I had one thousand and sixty.
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It's funny how a chubby kid can just be having fun, and people call it entertainment!
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I remember trying to be funny, and both of my parents were terribly funny. My father was also very dignified, but my mother was an absolute ding-a-ling, a ripper.
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There's nothing less funny than trying to force funny.
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In school I was always the funny-looking, tall, skinny kid that got made fun of because of my weird teeth.
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I'm an optimist, but an optimist who carries a raincoat.
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There are some extremely acceptable male comedians out there: Joel Osteen, Abraham Lincoln, the man who played Phil Spector in HBO's 'Phil Spector.' But even those guys, while insightful and amusing, aren't exactly funny.
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I watch the news, which is its own reality show. I love 'Curb Your Enthusiasm.' I love it because it's funny and because I realize that I'm happier than Larry David.
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I definitely knew I wanted to be an actor in high school. I was doing plays and musicals, and I loved 'Saturday Night Live' and thought that was what I wanted to do - funny sketches and comedies. So I knew then, but I didn't know how to go about it, but I found my way.
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I'm funny at home too, but not deliberately. My wife is usually laughing at me rather than with me.
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Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money?
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A good comedian can say things funny and other guys just say funny things.
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One night I realized that when you give people understanding and encouragement a funny little meek childish look abashes their eyes, no matter what they've been doing they weren't sure it was right - lambies all over the world.
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People are getting careers from YouTube and uploading videos. And they're totally different - you can't necessarily be funny on a video, and then all of a sudden you're live in a theater. You don't have the tools yet. It's a lot more involved to go from being funny on a little iPhone screen to being live in front of people and being funny.
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My grandparents would never admit to being Tasmanian, but I think it's really great and funny. But I guess, in the past, Tasmanians just weren't quite accepted. You had that lazy reference to them being felons.
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I actually find novels that are determined to be funny at every turn quite oppressive.
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I love Jared Hess' movies. He's such a weirdo and such a nice, funny guy.
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It's funny; people get so doctrinaire about music. It should be the last thing you don't have an open mind about.
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Fame is a funny thing. I like doing normal things. I like going to fairs. I like going to ball games. I like going to Disney World or a big field on the Fourth of July and having picnics with friends. The problem is you're either worried you're going to be recognized, or you're thankful you're not. It's always there.
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What am I responsible for? Who am I responsible to? Everybody? How come when Archie Bunker nailed everybody, it was funny - but when I do it, it's not?
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A lot of movies that come from Israel are about war, but there is such good, funny, rounded writing that comes from the country that I wish more people would discover.
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Acting is all about big hair and funny props... All the great actors knew it. Olivier knew it, Brando knew it.
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It's funny: when you're skating around during warm-ups, I'll see signs that say things like: 'Kane, Prom?' We have a fun, young team, and girls are asking you to the prom and giving you their numbers.
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What's so funny about cats is that they have this kind of aloof, superior vibe to them. Even if you love them, they are unpredictable. Dogs are more social, and the way that they attach and bond to us is much more human.
