Funny Quotes
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I never want to feel more than the viewers. I'm not trying to be an automaton. It's like when you see people laughing on camera, and you don't find it funny as a viewer - it's an offputting experience.
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You know what's funny? There's times when you catch a ball and really didn't even see that ball. You're like, 'That couldn't have been all me.'
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I'm an American so its kind of hard for me to talk about 9/11. So whenever someone brings it up in a conversation, I say "I didn't like 9/11."
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It's a funny thing: You want so badly for people to see what you do - you're proud of it - and I like the effect that movies have on people. But the attention can also make me uncomfortable.
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People think I am funny all the time. But I am not. I am serious, too. Also, I enjoy serious, dramatic films.
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I get asked, 'Who would you really like to work with?' I'm already working with them. Smart, talented, funny people, good musicians, an extended family, good friends.
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If you're funny, if there's something that makes you laugh, then every day's going to be okay.
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Acting is all about big hair and funny props... All the great actors knew it. Olivier knew it, Brando knew it.
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Comedians don't laugh. They're too busy analyzing why it's funny or not.
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My neighbor's not even listening to me. He's all excited about some garden hose he bought at Brookstone. He's convinced it was designed by NASA. "Actually, it's got two nozzles, one for the hot and one for the..." Really? Is it long enough to go around both our necks and the chimney so we can tandem jump off of this? That's all I really care about you and your little garden hose.
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Life would be tragic if it weren't funny.
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I have given my all Funny how you could always make me feel small
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If you can find the line between sympathetic and creepy, you have reached a very funny area.
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Attributed in the 'quote of the day' source code of the 'Fortune' computer program (June 1987); more at 'The Most Exciting Phrase in Science Is Not ‘Eureka!’ But ‘That’s funny …’' at Quote Investigator
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A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore.
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I just write what I think is funny. I don't care who watches it.
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I actually find novels that are determined to be funny at every turn quite oppressive.
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Two things I really wanted to be: a stand-up comic or a New York Yankee - or a really funny New York Yankee.
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What's great about stand-up is that you can say whatever you want and go around the country, and sometimes the world, and work on it and see how people react. You don't need Standards & Practices or notes from lawyers or producers to tell you what's funny.
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I love a smart, well-written show, and '30 Rock,' well, you can't get any better than that. Tina Fey poos funny. There's nothing that she does that isn't funny. That show is an example of how brilliant she is. It's so smart. They've done some brilliant commentary about the 'Housewives' with 'Queen of Jordan,' their show-within-the-show.
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I am not funny. The writers were funny. My directors were funny. The situations were funny… What I am is brave. I have never been scared. Not when I did movies, certainly not when I was a model and not when I did I Love Lucy.
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The idea that it is funny to see wild animals coerced into acting like clumsy humans, or thrilling to see powerful beasts reduced to cringing cowards by a whip-cracking trainer, is primitive and medieval. It stems from the old idea that we are superior to other species and have the right to hold dominion over them.
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It's funny: the reason I did 'Beautiful Creatures' was the same reason I did everything else - even though it was a genre film and existed at a more studio level, the script and the characters were so well written.
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I come from a time when people like Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby told stories that were devastatingly funny without being off-color.
