Funny Quotes
-
Whatever the occasion, do not neglect alcohol. No other refreshment will do. Yes, alcohol kills brain cells, but it's very selective. It only kills the brain cells that contain good sense, shame, embarrassment, and restraint.
-
When I used to see Rick Moranis do something, to me that was immediately funny. Or George Carlin or Martin Lawrence.
-
I find being funny very hard work. I am always asked about it, and I feel guilty saying that, but it's the truth. I love my work, but it ain't easy.
-
I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the home of the guy who invented the car alarm and set off all the car alarms on the block... pretty funny.
-
Being broke is a joke, I never found it funny / That's why I count my blessings / As much as I count my money...
-
Growing up, there were TV shows that were very funny but very traditional. Classic things like 'Fawlty Towers,' obviously, and 'Blackadder' were pretty traditionally shot. And then there were the ones that start to break the mold or be really ambitious. The ones that spring particularly to mind would be 'The Young Ones.'
-
I've been called a funny person for a long time. I don't know that I know anything about comedic acting.
-
Attributed in the 'quote of the day' source code of the 'Fortune' computer program (June 1987); more at 'The Most Exciting Phrase in Science Is Not ‘Eureka!’ But ‘That’s funny …’' at Quote Investigator
-
I don't need to convince anybody that I know kung fu, but maybe somebody needs to know that I really can act, without doing a Chinese accent or a funny walk.
-
A lot of times in comedy, and also in podcasting and television, there are different kinds of voices that can be celebrated. So you can have 'Insecure' exist, you can have a '2 Dope Queens' exist, you can have 'The Mindy Project' exist - very distinct, funny voices from women and from people of color.
-
I mean I've seen 3D films so far and I think it's a long way to go before they replace actors. It's a funny thing with 3D, I haven't quite got it yet. Yet.
-
I got attention by being funny at school, pretending to be retarded, and jumping around with a deformed hand.
-
A race track is a place where windows clean people.
-
Is everything funny? For me, yes. There's a positive to every negative. Even my divorce? For me, yes. If you go back and look at it, why it happened or how it happened, there's something in there that'll make you laugh.
-
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
-
I know some people say I can be funny. But there is always a deeper meaning to what I say. I am a socialist at heart and have the interests of the poor in mind. When people see how I manage to work my way out of tough situations, it gives them hope in their own life.
-
I play a lot of those parts, and it's a chicken-and-egg thing. I don't know whether you get scary because you play those parts or did you get those parts because you were scary? But I do believe that there's a very close connection to what's scary and what's funny. So I think if you have the ability to do one, you might have the ability to do the other.
-
We try to make the name longer and longer every year. First, it was 'Larry the Cable Guy's Christmas Spectacular.' Then it was 'It's a Very Larry Christmas.' Now it's 'Larry the Cable Guy's Hula-palooza Christmas Luau.' I'll tell you what it is: It's funny. That's what it is. Who cares what the name of it is? It is a funny special.
-
When you're a woman, you have to work harder to get a laugh... I follow so many hilarious women on Twitter. It's a daily reminder that women get to be funny.
-
In 'Sidney's Comet,' thanks to all the consumerism, all the garbage had to be put in deep space, even though we're not supposed to litter the cosmos - that was an environmental message. Although it was funny, it had an important message.
-
I'm blonde and tanned and normal-sized! I'm sweet, shy, funny, have a big heart and I'm nice - and I like to eat.
-
It's funny - I read that women look to chiseled-faced guys for one-night stands, and to round-faced guys for marriage. When I'm rounder in the face, I like to say, 'This is my long-term look.' Or 'This is my wife-and-kids look right here.'
-
I was so flat-chested in high school that I thought I'd better be funny if guys were going to like me.
-
Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and illiterate sport fishermen.
