Funny Quotes
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'Indiana Jones' wasn't physically tough, but they are the only two films I've ever been ill on. On 'The Last Crusade,' I got sciatica. That's when the sciatic nerve, which goes through the funny hole in your pelvis down your leg, swells and rubs against the nerves.
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Everyone told me to pass on Speed because it was a 'bus movie.'
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It's a funny thing, by the way, how people who love free markets are also quite sure that they know that investors are being irrational.
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At the end, excitement maintained its hysteria.
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But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough.
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My sister wanted a cat for a pet... I wanted a dog, so they bought a cat and taught it to bark.
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This city has so many beautiful women. I fall in love like every ten minutes, I'm sitting on the subway, I'm like, "There's my wife... there she is - oh, she's getting off. All right, there's the woman - all right, that's a man."
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Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down.
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You ever talk about a movie with someone that read the book? They're always so condescending. 'Ah, the book was much better than the movie.' Oh really? What I enjoyed about the movie: no reading.
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My job is to bring the tickle. I know what's funny.
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I'm not sure either of them had a great capacity for love, that was all. it's funny - mine feels bottomless.
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Sam writes in her funny, fascinating memoir, Not By Accident.
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I am a guy who talks about bacon and escalators.
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I'd like to make you laugh for about ten minutes though I'm gonna be on for an hour.
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Right now Andy Larkin is pitching just like young Andy Larkin.
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It's funny, when I'm not on the road or doing stuff with Bad Company - or whatever- I've always written songs galore... a lot of stuff people don't even hear.
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The Phillies beat the Cubs today in a doubleheader. That puts another keg in the Cubs' coffin.
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I think absurdist humor is funny...
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A beautiful vacuum filled with wealthy monogamists, all powerful and members of the best families all drinking themselves to death.
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People are always asking couples whose marriage has endured at least a quarter of a century for their secret for success. Actually, it is no secret at all. I am a forgiving woman. Long ago, I forgave my husband for not being Paul Newman.
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A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
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The boat was so old; it must have been launched when Long John Silver had two legs and an egg on his shoulder.
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I try to find a way to make it comfortable or interesting or funny to me.
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As a model, we come in the room, and we are casted just on our looks. I think I'm funny; I think I'm clever. But in the end, they're picking me for my cheekbones or if I'm tall enough.
