Funny Quotes
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That big guy, Winfield, at 6'6", can do things only a small man can do.
Jerry Coleman -
That old question about whether, as a woman, you can be funny and attractive at the same time. Argh! I hate that question. Of course you can.
Emma Stone
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It's funny how the present can change the past.
Andrew Sean Greer -
Truth gets well if she is run over by a locomotive, while error dies of lockjaw if she scratches her finger.
William Cullen Bryant -
I'm the only man in the world with a marriage licence made out to whom it may concern.
Mickey Rooney -
Many people think the Cards at the end of the wire will cross the finish line first.
Jerry Coleman -
The worst of being a Communist is the parties you may go to are - well - awfully funny and touching but not very gay...I don't see the point of sad parties, do you? And Left-wing people are always sad because they mind dreadfully about their causes, and the causes are always going so badly.
Nancy Mitford -
Nobody cared about swimming. You could draw a crowd for basketball.
Merlin Olsen
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I don't so much mind that newspapers are dying - it's watching them commit suicide that pisses me off.
Molly Ivins -
You find out in life that people really like you funny. So what do you give 'em? Humor. And then if you show them the other side, they don't like you as much. I find, too, that I can hide behind the idiot's mask being funny, and you never see the sorrow or the pain.
Terry Bradshaw -
What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a marketing meeting somewhere, 'Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.'
Jim Gaffigan -
I'm not sure either of them had a great capacity for love, that was all. it's funny - mine feels bottomless.
Elizabeth Noble -
Once anyone who has a sense of humor can do what they want, they want to do funny bits as much as possible.
Gavin McInnes -
I challenge anyone, even with a radar machine, to hit that slider.
Jerry Coleman
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I know. I'm lazy. But I made myself a New Years resolution that I would write myself something really special. Which means I have 'til December, right?
Catherine O'Hara -
I find it very difficult to be funny, it's much easier to do tragedy than it is to do comedy.
Eric Drooker -
It's pretty funny when we go out to countries where the drinking age is 13 or 14, and we all go to bars and order and drink some stuff. Our parents will go, 'Hey!' And we go, 'We are legal to drink here!'
Ben Gillies Silverchair -
It's a base hit on the error by Roberts.
Jerry Coleman -
He many not be hurt as much as he really is.
Jerry Coleman -
There are many different ways of being funny. I'm not sure that there's so many different ways of being dramatic.
Isabelle Huppert
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The last time Pena faced the Padres, the Dodgers scratched for a run to tie the game and then went on to win 4-0.
Jerry Coleman -
I can be educational, but if I'm not funny and entertaining, too, who's going to come and listen to me or watch me on TV.
Bill Nye -
My sister wanted a cat for a pet... I wanted a dog, so they bought a cat and taught it to bark.
Chic Murray -
Comedy is a very personal thing, and some people will find it funny, some people wont.
Stephen Mangan