Funny Quotes
-
'Indiana Jones' wasn't physically tough, but they are the only two films I've ever been ill on. On 'The Last Crusade,' I got sciatica. That's when the sciatic nerve, which goes through the funny hole in your pelvis down your leg, swells and rubs against the nerves.
-
It’s funny how one summer can change everything.
-
You can never not feel like that, as a working artist these days. It's funny - time off makes me nervous, but so does time on. At least the pressure wasn't coming from outside.
-
What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.
-
I think people are surprised to learn that I'm pretty goofy and pretty funny.
-
I never thought I was funny, but I enjoy being funny
-
I've been a part of this before, where you think the racing gods are against you, then next thing you know, you can't do anything wrong. You're winning races and doing things you feel like you shouldn't have done that particular day. It all comes full circle in this sport. It has a funny way of doing it.
-
She's a classy girl though, at least all her tattoos are spelt right.
-
Funny things happen to you in movies for silly reasons.
-
Truth gets well if she is run over by a locomotive, while error dies of lockjaw if she scratches her finger.
-
I saw this college team bowling championship. Each team had their own coach. What kind of strategy advice is a bowling coach giving? "You know what? This time Timmy, I want you to knock down all the pins." "You sure?" "Trust me. Just do it son!"
-
The best computer is a man, and it’s the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labor.
-
Over the course of a season, a miscue will cost you more than a good play.
-
I'm an educator. You do what you have to do to get what you are saying across, and if that means being funny, that's what I do.
-
To the people I forgot, you weren't on my mind for some reason and you probably don't deserve any thanks anyway.
-
The Padres, after winning the first game of the doubleheader, are ahead here in the top of the fifth and hoping for a split.
-
I do quite like sightseeing. I like churches, museums, galleries and all that stuff. I love the smell of a church in Italy or the smell of an old greasy spoon somewhere. I like markets and little funny shops in the backstreets of Florence.
-
Every morning I hear the alarm, it's like "BEEP BEEP BEEP" For second I'm like, "I could get used to that, just dream I'm in a techno club, or something."
-
I love to make things. If I have some free time and you have a dollar and a dream and you are making something funny and cool I'd love to be a part of it.
-
But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough.
-
It will be funny in about 10 years.
-
My neighbor has two dogs. One of them says to the other, "Woof!" The other replies, "Moo!" The dog is perplexed. "Moo? Why did you say 'Moo'?" The other dog says, "I'm trying to learn a foreign language."
-
You can never look that tough in glasses. ... You never see somebody push up their glasses and say, "I'm gonna kick your ass."
-
Of all the things that make up what was home It’s funny how they make me feel alone
