Jeff Garlin Quotes
I never analyze stuff with comedy because it's boring. It makes you stop being funny. Just be who you are and do what you do, and you're either funny or you're not.
Quotes to Explore
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The minute I stop singing orally, I start to sing by playing Lucille.
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It may sound funny, but it's true: I tried to put myself through the 12-step program. I didn't want to attend a real meeting; my role didn't really require that, and I feel those meetings are sort of sacred, and they're anonymous for a reason. I tried to deal with some of my love of snacks - and I relapsed a lot.
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I much prefer doing comedy. I get a little paranoid when the audience is not laughing.
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I actually love doing comedy!
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People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
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I am trying to do comedy on every single medium. I consider myself a public servant.
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I'd previously done 'Expelled,' and that was more on the comedy side, so I really wanted to challenge myself and see if I could actually do a drama.
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I love to drive in the Black Hills of Wyoming and South Dakota with Mount Rushmore as the central stop.
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There's a picture there that people realize that, we stop helping Israel, we lose God's hand, and we're in big time trouble.
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The fact is that viewers are fickle and it's rare that such a large group of people can be categorized in any type of way. There's enough content to go around, and if we stop focusing on numbers and start focusing on the quality of the project, then I think everybody - viewers and artists alike - is going to be a lot happier.
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We try to make the name longer and longer every year. First, it was 'Larry the Cable Guy's Christmas Spectacular.' Then it was 'It's a Very Larry Christmas.' Now it's 'Larry the Cable Guy's Hula-palooza Christmas Luau.' I'll tell you what it is: It's funny. That's what it is. Who cares what the name of it is? It is a funny special.
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Comedy's really subjective, you know.
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A failure is not always a mistake, it may simply be the best one can do under the circumstances. The real mistake is to stop trying.
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When I walked out on the mound, I felt enclosed. You see, I'd been used to playing on pastures, where when somebody hit a ball you had to stop it from rolling. Well, this field had fences around it.
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I put a lot of pressure on myself. I think something's not good enough, and I won't stop until I feel like I've made it. I'm never satisfied.
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It's much funnier when the comedy can happen with me just trying my best to genuinely do a good thing.
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I have my website, The Ruckus, which is an Internet site, similar to the Funny or Die format, where people post funny videos. I get a chance to rate their videos; they get a chance to blog and kick it with me.
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When I was a kid, I used to make up all these characters. I love comedy a lot, and I don't get to do it often. Somewhere in the middle, I shifted into doing drama.
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National League umpires wear inside chest protesters.
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Stealing home is one of the most sensational plays in baseball. If the run thus scored is the winning tally, the play is, of course, all the more thrilling. It is a play that requires a lot of quick thinking to bring about a successful completion. The chap who has slow moving feet and a slower moving brain had better never try to steal home.
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Society isn't good at dealing with people who have something concrete to feel guilty about or who are dealing with a loss.
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I never think of the future. It comes soon enough.
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He’d seen too often how little of the universe is designed for man to neglect any safety measure.
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I never analyze stuff with comedy because it's boring. It makes you stop being funny. Just be who you are and do what you do, and you're either funny or you're not.
