Chic Murray (Charles Thomas McKinnon "Chic" Murray) Quotes
The police stopped me when I was out in my car. They told me it was a spot check. I admitted to two pimples and a boil.
Quotes to Explore
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I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent.
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A lot of newspaper columns used to be written in a rat-a-tat-tat, fast-paced style - and they tended to be funny. They were a little relief from the grimmer, grayer parts of the newspaper, and one of the best people at doing this was Will Rogers.
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My dad is a really funny guy, and we would make jokes about my leukemia. When my friends would come over, we would joke about it, too.
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Literary dementia seems dated now, but there was a time when a month in the funny farm was as de rigueur for budding writers as an M.F.A. is now. To be sent away was a badge of honor; to undergo electroshock, a glorious martyrdom.
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Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
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The word 'geek' today does not mean what it used to mean. A geek isn't the skinny kid with a pocket protector and acne. There can be computer geeks, video game geeks, car geeks, military geeks, and sports geeks. Being a geek just means that you're passionate about something.
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I tried to go out for theater or theater arts, but I was too scared or too intimidated. But I had a lot of friends on the cross country team that had great senses of humor.
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All these police treating our people wrong, man. Black lives matter, but we got fans of all different colors, so all lives matter.
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I have my website, The Ruckus, which is an Internet site, similar to the Funny or Die format, where people post funny videos. I get a chance to rate their videos; they get a chance to blog and kick it with me.
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The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.
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I wore goofy hats to school and did musical theater. Most people thought I was a dork. But if you have a sense of humor about it, no one can bring you down.
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Turn up the lights. I don't want to go home in the dark.
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If you're playing a good guy, you show some darkness. If you're playing a dark guy, you show something different, like humor, that will mix it up and hopefully surpass the audience's expectations. What I'm battling all the time is complacency in the audience. I try to bring a little mystery to what might happen because that engages people more.
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There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.
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I always dreamed about getting on TV and being part of a team - a funny ensemble.
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It's a funny thing, but today the Titanic is probably much more - that is people are much more aware of it than they were in 1954, when I was doing my research.
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Possibly I've become less funny as I've been happier.
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I was asking the school shrink, 'Has anyone ever told you the top of your head looks like a penis?' I thought that was a really funny thing to tell a bald shrink.
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Men are always the same. Fear makes them cruel.
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The jokes are great but what really matters for a comedian is his performance, his whole attitude, and the laughs that he gets between the jokes rather than on top of the jokes.
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I think that everyone should be able to dribble. Everyone should be able to pass. Otherwise, why are you out there?
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The great irony to Dirk [Gently] is that he sees connections in everything, but the one thing he fails and struggles with most is connecting with other people.
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The police stopped me when I was out in my car. They told me it was a spot check. I admitted to two pimples and a boil.
