Humor Quotes
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After I told my wife that black underwear turned me on, she didn't wash my Y-fronts for a month.
Chic Murray
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Rick Miller hit only one home run last year, and that's like hitting none.
Jerry Coleman
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I really wouldn't want to live in America. I found New York claustrophobic and dirty. I missed England when I was there, simple things like smells and the British sense of humor.
Jonny Lee Miller
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Humor has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.
Thomas Carlyle
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Everybody blames the Jews for killing Christ, and the Jews try to pass it off on the Romans. I'm one of the few people who believes it was the blacks.
Sarah Silverman
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This city has so many beautiful women. I fall in love like every ten minutes, I'm sitting on the subway, I'm like, "There's my wife... there she is - oh, she's getting off. All right, there's the woman - all right, that's a man."
Jim Gaffigan
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I do have a dirty sense of humor.
Josh Gad
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At the end, excitement maintained its hysteria.
Jerry Coleman
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I never have free time, I don't know about you. You ever go to the cash machine, there's two people in line in front of you and you get kinda flustered, you're like "Forget it! I'm not standing here for 40 seconds. I got things to do, okay?"
Jim Gaffigan
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The Padres, after winning the first game of the doubleheader, are ahead here in the top of the fifth and hoping for a split.
Jerry Coleman
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My wife, my daughters, even my grandchildren are funny. You've got to keep a sense of humor because anger destroys you.
Michael Caine
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I want to be taken seriously as the type of musician that plays stuff like an electric rake. I mean, how seriously do you take someone like Spike Jones? They take him pretty seriously - a really good musician who made a great contribution in terms of humor, which is part of what I try to do too.
Eugene Chadbourne
