Humor Quotes
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If you want a lot of visual humor, the way to do it is have visual people do it.
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True humor springs not more from the head than from the heart. It is not contempt; its essence is love. It issues not in laughter, but in still smiles, which lie far deeper.
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The boat was so old; it must have been launched when Long John Silver had two legs and an egg on his shoulder.
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You ever find yourself being lazy for no reason at all? Like, you pick up your mail, you go in your house, you realize you have a letter for a neighbor. You ever just look at the letter and go "Hm. Looks like they're never getting this. It'll take too much energy to go back outside. I'm gonna get that to them later on. Right now I gotta watch some 'Love Connection.' They got some new host on there."
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Wit and humor belong to genius alone.
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Turner was like a pencil. He bent around that pitch!
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It's nice when you are with a guy who can find the humor in touch situations and be comfortable enough in his own skin that he can laugh at himself.
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I am a great believer that what makes our show different is the humor.
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Imagination offers people consolation for what they cannot be, and humor for what they actually are.
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Once anyone who has a sense of humor can do what they want, they want to do funny bits as much as possible.
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To me, sadness and humor aren't disrelated and humor is the best tool I've had against the sadness in my life.
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The Padres, after winning the first game of the doubleheader, are ahead here in the top of the fifth and hoping for a split.
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Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.
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Every morning I hear the alarm, it's like "BEEP BEEP BEEP" For second I'm like, "I could get used to that, just dream I'm in a techno club, or something."
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Reggie Smith of the Dodgers and Gary Matthews of the homers hit Braves in that game.
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Wouldn't it have been weird to go to high school with the Pope? You know, somebody did, someone's sitting at home, watching TV in Poland, they see the Pope, they think, "That guy was a jerk! He was so mean to me and now he's Pope? I got a swirly from the Pope!"
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You ever talk about a movie with someone that read the book? They're always so condescending. 'Ah, the book was much better than the movie.' Oh really? What I enjoyed about the movie: no reading.
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Figuring out a way to use humor to deal with important issues I think is very important. Laughter is a great diffuser.
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Never accept a drink from a urologist.
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The great thing about university is that they incline you to get up and do it, from the Classics to modern plays, to the humor that Monty Pythons made popular.
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Ozzie Smith is out there roaming around like glass.
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humor bears the closest relation to emotion, either bubbling up as from a deep and happy wellspring, or in an opposite fashion rising like a re-birth of feeling from dead levels after turmoil.
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Life is a little easier for attractive people. Think about it: if a stranger smiles at you and they’re attractive, you think, ‘Oh, they’re nice,’ but if a stranger’s ugly, you’re like, ‘What do they want? Get away from me, weirdo.
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Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.
