Humor Quotes
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Kippers : fish that like a lot of sleep.
Chic Murray
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I have heard it said that a complicated childhood can lead to a life in the arts. I tell you this story of my father and me to let you know I am qualified to be a comedian.
Steve Martin
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I could never be Charlie Chaplin. But the films that were made by people like him, or Gene Wilder, or John Candy, the people that inspired me so much were the people that were able to combine humor with heartbreak so beautifully and fluidly. Those films I think were what inspired me to want to come to L.A. and audition for movies.
Emma Stone
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When the Constitution declares that 'all men are created equal,' it is not referring to intelligence, good looks, good humor, height, weight, or income. It is talking about certain rights, 'inalienable', in that they cannot be taken away.
Elisabeth Elliot
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Hrabosky looks fierce in that Fu Manchu haircut.
Jerry Coleman
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I don't think my sense of humor has changed at all; I was born with this, for better or for worse.
Ivan Reitman
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God has a sense of humor. If you don't believe me, tomorrow go to wal-mart and just look at people.
Carlos Mencia
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We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist.
Joseph Heller
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I see some people with glasses here, I trust people with glasses, don't you? But if you're wearing your glasses like this ... "Get away from 'em!"
Jim Gaffigan
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The Padres, after winning the first game of the doubleheader, are ahead here in the top of the fifth and hoping for a split.
Jerry Coleman
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You ever find yourself being lazy for no reason at all? Like, you pick up your mail, you go in your house, you realize you have a letter for a neighbor. You ever just look at the letter and go "Hm. Looks like they're never getting this. It'll take too much energy to go back outside. I'm gonna get that to them later on. Right now I gotta watch some 'Love Connection.' They got some new host on there."
Jim Gaffigan
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I like people with a good sense of humor, like Jennifer Aniston. She is amazing and is a great actress.
Helio Castroneves
