Humor Quotes
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A sense of humor is so handy, isn't it? It lets you see both sides of a question so that you never need do anything.
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I was trampled to death by a man who believed his luggage would be the first piece off. If he were an experienced traveler, he would know that the first piece of luggage belongs to no one. It's just a dummy suitcase to give everyone hope.
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What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a marketing meeting somewhere, 'Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.'
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People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.
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When you look like your passport photo, it's time to go home.
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It's a base hit on the error by Roberts.
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Houston has its largest crowd of the night here this evening.
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In a girl I look for honesty above all, someone who I can carry on a conversation with, someone who has a good sense of humor, someone who's true to herself, and to top it, someone who can get ready for a date in less than ten minutes.
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My son did not show signs of a money deficiency until he opened his small fist in the nursery and found it was empty.
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Humor is a key to a happy life with ADD.
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It's funny because it's true, and also it's the kind of humor that makes you think.
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If I raised my hand to wipe the hair out of my children's eyes, they'd flinch and call their attorney.
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Humor is the most important thing in life. It trumps everything else, and it's the only thing that helps me deal with everything else.
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To me, being funny is more important than making a point, but I don't know. Most politicians are so interested in making points that they don't ... I'd rather be funny myself, and I'd rather listen to somebody with a little sense of humor.
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After all, when a thought takes one's breath away, a lesson on grammar seems an impertinence.
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Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
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From Lucifer to Jerry Sneak there is not an aspect of evil, imperfection, and littleness which can elude the lights of humor or the lightning of wit.
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One does not laugh because one is happy; one is happy because one laughs.
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If I can't see the humor in it, how am I going to be funny?
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I went to the dentist. He said "Say Aaah." I said "Why?" He said "My dog's died."
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Delicate humor is the crowning virtue of the saints.
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Humor can help you to disagree without being disagreeable. The key in democracy is not necessarily that we agree, but that we participate....Despite all the heavy problems- domestic and international- there is humor. Humor transcends partisanship.
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Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
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All the Padres need is a fly ball in the air.
