Funny Quotes
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Malfoy glanced around. Harry knew he was checking for signs of teachers. Then he looked back at Harry and said in a low voice, "You're dead, Potter." Harry raised his eyebrows. "Funny," he said, "you'd think I'd have stopped walking around.
Joanne Rowling
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I know I'm funny, because I'm eccentric, I'm odd. I'm not what you expect.
Marian Seldes
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Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and he will be certain that you are either telling the truth or a big, important lie.
P. J. O'Rourke
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I do get funny people sometimes coming up to me in supermarkets in America with my picture in their pocket, which is a bit strange.
Saffron Burrows
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I like doing what I do, but I like having the opportunity to do different things, and obviously comedy would be a fun jump. I've just been lucky enough to stay working. In my case, playing intense roles or playing character roles is something that people will hire me for, but yeah, I'd like somebody to think I'm funny. I guess we all do, right?
Jason Wiles
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The sky is so clear today you can see all the way to Missouri.
Jerry Coleman
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There are practical things which contribute to a joke's funniness. People will find a joke funnier if they are sitting closer together, if it's cold, if they've paid and if they are told it's funny beforehand.
Ben Miller
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We moved to Baltimore, Maryland, in 1979, when I was five. The funny thing is that, even though Baltimore had one of the top murder rates in the country in those days, I grew up hearing about how dangerous New York was.
Philipp Meyer
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I felt as out of place as a left-handed violinist in a crowded string section.
Chic Murray
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I went to my first school dance on the set of 'Spider-Man.' The funny thing is, it wasn't actually real. I didn't choose my dress or my date or anything about it. I just showed up for work.
Angourie Rice
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For sheer sexiness, a man must be beautiful. Funny. yes. Clever, no.
Jilly Cooper
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It's funny - nowadays people that are famous get chased by paparazzi. They have this fame, but they don't have the money to hide from it.
Matt LeBlanc
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Journalists said they had never seen so many funny women as leads when we did 'Hotwives' - we had a cast of seven very funny women. That doesn't happen.
Danielle Schneider
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It's funny: I don't know if she babysat, but I spent time with Judy Blume when I was little.
David Grann
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To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.
Reba McEntire
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Monstress is an exhilarating rollercoaster of a book. Deeply funny, heartbreaking, hopeful, philosophical, bawdy, and wise, Lysley Tenorio’s stories, written from the underbelly of the American Dream, present one brilliant portrait after another.
Sabina Murray
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All the people who run agencies, all the important people in agencies have taken communication courses, marketing courses, advertising courses, and courses basically teach advertising as a science, and advertising is so far from a science it isn't even funny. Advertising is an art.
George Lois
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People say to me 'You're a big Hollywood star', and I find it so funny. I still feel as though I'm the girl from Golders Green. I lead such a boring, normal life. I still go shopping in Sainsbury's. If the ability to do that was taken away from me, I'd go barmy. You lose your freedom. Be careful what you wish for.
Amanda Donohoe
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If I bring anything to the table, it's the fact that not everybody realizes they're funny. So I just point a finger.
P. J. O'Rourke
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I heard that people were really interested in the new haircut, which I think is so funny. Great haircut, I really like it. It goes great with the time period. And I was super, super, super-happy to have my bangs swept to the side rather than straight in front of me, which I dealt with for three seasons. I'm very, very much done with that.
Elisabeth Moss
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Phil Hartman was brilliant, and Dave Foley is a really funny guy. Phil Hartman was actually even funnier offstage than he was onstage because he would say nasty things. Dave Foley's very funny, very witty guy, very quick.
Joe Rogan
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After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say 'I want to see the manager.'
William S. Burroughs
