Funny Quotes
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Nine out of 10 times these guys will hit it-they'll be on something incredibly funny, but one out of 10, two out of 10, they'll fall flat on their faces. That's what makes them great actors: they take those chances, they don't play it safe.
Peter Farrelly
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Doing funny scary is something that is rarely good and rarely works, and it's also something that's incredibly hard to market.
Kevin Bacon
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Every movie I do, I always use things that have happened in my life. Funny moments, anything. If it just sticks out I'll write it down and use that, too, because it has to come out of you. But no one can work when they're depressed. I don't think I'd physically be able to do it if I were depressed.
Kirsten Dunst
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Trailing 5-1, the Padres added an insurance run in the eighth inning.
Jerry Coleman
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I wanted to be a "serious artist." Serious artists didn't tend to be funny. But that didn't get me a lot of attention. And just growing older, you can't help it, you take things less seriously.
Gabrielle Bell
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My mother was so house proud that when my father got up to sleepwalk she had the bed made by the time he got back.
Chic Murray
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My mom wasn't so much such a great cook. But I don't know, I think I have a very strong mother, and it's funny, because both of my sisters - I have two sisters, and I'm the baby, but they all work hard. I'm not sure where I get it from, and I'm not sure where they get it from, but they must get it from somewhere... I like to work.
April Bloomfield
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It's funny. When I saw the script in my inbox and it said 'Sparkle,' I thought, 'For real? It's really called 'Sparkle?' I was wondering, too, how does 'Jordin Sparks as Sparkle' sound?
Jordin Sparks
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Every minute you spend in planning saves 10 minutes in execution; this gives you a 1,000 percent Return on Energy!
Brian Tracy
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Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and he will be certain that you are either telling the truth or a big, important lie.
P. J. O'Rourke
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Funny enough, the person who is most bummed out to hear I won't be back is Mark Cuban. Despite what you might surmise from on screen, he and I are actually good friends - just really competitive good friends.
Chris Sacca
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Network was just never the right fit with what I think is funny.
Jason Jones
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I made the choice long ago to write about real life. And life is both serious and funny.
Paula Danziger
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I think 'Breaking Bad' is brilliant. Good drama in the U.S. is also so funny and blurs the line between light and dark.
Arthur Darvill
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My son is such a lover, such a caretaker and so funny. He's seven, and he genuinely cracks me up. And my daughter is a fearless powerhouse. They fill me with wonder and admiration.
Kelly Sue DeConnick
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One time, I was so hungry, I ate the beans in a bean bag chair.
George Lopez
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There's a funny thing that, in film now, everybody thinks that the director does everything, and in TV, everybody thinks that the writer does everything, and I'm quite comfortable with that as a director. I don't mind that.
Colm McCarthy
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Shirley MacLaine said, You're so funny, then gave me a hug. Everything went white. I couldn't hear, I couldn't see. I thought I was going to pass out.
Lisa Kudrow
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The most comical thing for me, even when I watch movies, is the guy who's so crazy confident about himself, with the mink jacket - to me, that is so funny. I wish I could be like that. As a fighter, I wish I could do that, so I could make people laugh. But I can't; it's not my style.
Eddie Alvarez
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I watch a lot of TV, I drink a lot of coffee, but you know what's really addictive? Heroin.
Jim Gaffigan
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West Germans are tall, pink, pert and orthodontically corrected, with hands, teeth and hair as clean as their clothes and clothes as sharp as their looks. Except for the fact that they all speak English pretty well, they're indistinguishable from Americans.
P. J. O'Rourke
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It's funny how the hippies and the punks tried to get rid of the conservatives, but they always seem to get the upper hand in the end.
Bjork
