William Howard Taft Quotes
Well, I have one consolation. No candidate was ever elected ex-president by such a large majority!
Quotes to Explore
-
I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too.
-
I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the home of the guy who invented the car alarm and set off all the car alarms on the block... pretty funny.
-
It may sound funny, but it's true: I tried to put myself through the 12-step program. I didn't want to attend a real meeting; my role didn't really require that, and I feel those meetings are sort of sacred, and they're anonymous for a reason. I tried to deal with some of my love of snacks - and I relapsed a lot.
-
Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
-
I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent.
-
I don't think arrested-adolescent humor will fade. Maybe the form will change, but I guarantee its replacement will still be based in immature behavior from mature figures.
-
Whenever I'm in the U.K., people say I have an American accent. Which is, obviously, funny.
-
People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
-
It's funny - I read that women look to chiseled-faced guys for one-night stands, and to round-faced guys for marriage. When I'm rounder in the face, I like to say, 'This is my long-term look.' Or 'This is my wife-and-kids look right here.'
-
My dad is a really funny guy, and we would make jokes about my leukemia. When my friends would come over, we would joke about it, too.
-
People are going to label you anyway, but the one that bugs me the most is when they say, 'One of the funniest female comedians.' There's s no 'funniest male comedians.' You're either a funny comedian, or you're not!
-
Pinochet and Barack Obama both have the same primary goal, and that's to be president and stay president as long as allowed.
-
Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
-
Humor can be an incredible lacerating and effective weapon. And that is the way I use it.
-
Being a humorist is not a voluntary thing. You can tell this because in a situation where saying a funny thing will cause a lot of trouble, a humorist will still say the funny thing. No matter how inappropriate.
-
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
-
I like children - fried.
-
Jack Black is so funny! On and off screen, like, he would make you laugh every day. He's hilarious.
-
I have said many times-if I hadn't been exposed to music as a child I don't think I would have been president.
-
Even though my dad was a manager in the minor leagues, I still traveled around with him and saw it from the field out. Now, as an owner, you're kind of looking from the whole baseball activity from outside in, from a fan's perspective.
-
I'm not the least bit polished, I come from a blue collar background and I never thought I could feel comfortable around the English.
-
Publish and be dammed.
-
Well, I have one consolation. No candidate was ever elected ex-president by such a large majority!
