Funny Quotes
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I only dated one Asian girl, but she was very Asian. She was a panda.
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I'm a funny person, but I take my music seriously.
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Everybody's funny in different ways.
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I'm a big fan of comedians not having to apologize for anything. Nowadays it seems comedians are always apologizing for being funny.
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For every book you buy, you should buy the time to read it.
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I haven't watched 'Mad TV' a lot, but I have seen some stuff on there that is truly funny. You have to have some sort of attitude toward the subject, and they seem to have it. It depends on how much blood you want to draw.
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My favorite television show has changed throughout the years. I used to think 'Married... With Children' was really funny. But now that I've gotten older, it's 'The Golden Girls,' believe it or not. That shows kills me.
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Oh! a private buffoon is a light-hearted loon,
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Rally points scoring is twenty for the fastest, eighteen for the second fastest, right down to six points for the slowest fastest.
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Just as we don't spend a lot of time worrying about how all those poets out there are going to monetize their poetry, the same is true for most bloggers.
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You're damn right I do. I'm in Madison Square Garden getting the s*** knocked out of me
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If you play comedic scenes like they're really serious, then it's so much more funny than if you're going for a laugh.
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That home run ties it up, 1-0.
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Chevy Chase and Bill Murray - we thought those guys were funny. We love Bill Murray, but we didn't think they were right for Airplane! because it would step on the joke if there was a known comedian.
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Jenson Button is in the top ten, in eleventh position.
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Hitler was a vegetarian. Just goes to show, vegetarianism, not always a good thing. Can in some extreme cases lead to genocide.
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It's more difficult getting up early in the morning when you're wearing silk pajamas.
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There's a lot of very funny people I'd love to work with that I've never met, of course. I love Steve Martin and Jim Carrey.
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The police stopped me when I was out in my car. They told me it was a spot check. I admitted to two pimples and a boil.
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Opinions are like nipples, everybody has one. Some have firm points, others are barely discernible through layers, and some are displayed at every opportunity regardless of whether the audience has stated "I am interested in your nipples" or not.
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Kissing on screen is just - funny enough, you're just acting, so you're distracted by that more than anything. Or at least I am.
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I had the classic 40 meltdown, I did. It's embarrassing. It was pretty funny. But then I recovered. To me, it was like a second adolescence. Hormonally, my body was changing, my mind was changing, and so my relationship to myself and the world around me came to this assault of finiteness.
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There's a difference between delivering real funny and just silly funny.
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His herding instinct is so strong that he confuses tractors on a baseball field for sheep. He was hospitalized twice. Once by a line drive and once for attacking a tractor tread.
