Funny Quotes

I love sprinting, but I hate long-distance running. Isn't that funny?

Dylan O'Brien
- Long
- Hate
- Running
The funny part is I feel like somebody is stalking me, like, at my local course and sizing up my game.

Stephen Curry
- Game
- Part
- Sizing up

I tried to go to community college for a while, and it's a funny story. I walked into the English class on the first day, and they told us to write about what we did over the summer. I can't remember exactly, but I think I walked out exactly at that point and went to the office to ask for my money back.

Zach Condon
- Writing
- Money
- Remember
Roosevelt could always keep ahead with his work, but I cannot do it, and I know it is a grievous fault, but it is too late to remedy it. The country must take me as it found me. Wasn't it your mother who had a servant girl who said it was no use for her to try to hurry, that she was a "Sunday chil" and no "Sunday chil" could hurry? I don't think I am a Sunday child, but I ought to have been; then I would have had an excuse for always being late.

William Howard Taft
- Country
- Children
- Mother
I actually was class clown, but I don't know how that happened because I've never been considered an outwardly funny person-as the people in this room will attest.

Janeane Garofalo
- People
- Funny
And regardless of the fact that in this country, certainly in the arts, we treat comedy as a second-class citizen, I've never thought of it that way. I've always thought it to be important. The last time I looked, the Greeks were holding up two masks. I've always thought of it not only as having equal value, but as the craft of it, being funny.

Jeff Daniels
- Up
- Time
- Important
The conundrum that I face on a daily basis is that I have two sons who have grown up watching 'The Simpsons,' so they know exactly what buttons to push. They know how Bart irritates Homer, and they use these lines against me to tell me that I'm not funny anymore.

Matt Groening
- Up
- Funny
- Daily
There are things that I won't joke about, but it's not because I don't think they're funny or they can't be made funny. It's just that they don't fit my particular skill set.

Brad Williams
- Funny
- Fit
- Joke