Funny Quotes
-
The real challenge lies in maintaining dignity while being funny. I am in awe of Krushna Abhishek's energy and Bharti Singh's wit. They are infectious and selfless.
-
I've always wanted to work with children, to help people, and to be funny.
-
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
-
I don't really need to be dirty to be funny.
-
It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world.
-
With any of the movies I've had a chance to do, or any of the TV shows I've had a chance to contribute to, people approach me and say, 'Hey, would you like to do this?' I laugh out loud and say, 'Yes, that'd be funny.' Or, I'm very moved by what I read and say, 'Yes. How can I help you?'
-
I like getting up in front of an audience. It's fun when you go to a baseball game and the crowd is cheering you. I can't deny it. And it's very funny, too. Sometimes you're shy; you go somewhere and everyone's looking at you, so you feel a little self-conscious.
-
Banjos are funny instruments. They can get pretty irritating.
-
Sometimes I'm real cool, but sometimes I could be a real asshole. I think everyone is like that.
-
Those amateur umpires are certainly flexing their fangs tonight.
-
And when you're on your own there is that terrifying possibility that you may be the only person on the planet who thinks it's funny - and you have no way of finding out.
-
No volleyball play can begin without a serve, and the serve is the only technique that is totally under your control. In other endeavors, you cannot succeed without believing in yourself, and that belief is completely under your control.
-
I love New York on summer afternoons when everyone's away. There's something very sensuous about it - overripe, as if all sorts of funny fruits were going to fall into your hands.
-
National League umpires wear inside chest protesters.
-
It's so funny, you go to acting school thinking you're going to learn how to be other people, but really it taught me how to be myself. Because it's in understanding yourself deeply that you can lend yourself to another person's circumstances and another person's experience.
-
It's so funny when people who are not used to making movies get into it. You just can't believe how insufferably boring it is. Waiting around and doing these lines over and over and finally having to go in and loop the lines and dub them.
-
I don't care how handsome or fabulous or funny the groom is, or how sweet and accommodating the bride, or vice versa. Marriage is hard.
-
I don't really have funny things to say about politics. I wish I did, but I don't.
-
Rally points scoring is twenty for the fastest, eighteen for the second fastest, right down to six points for the slowest fastest.
-
I'm an ocean, because I'm really deep. If you search deep enough you can find rare exotic treasures.
-
I personally do not find puke funny. I find it disgusting.
-
You are not just a funny person or just a journalist. Most people are hybrids of having a smart opinion and a great sense of humor.
-
It's funny when I read the tabloids and they're reporting on only a fraction of the life I'm leading.
-
Gonzo leaps like a giraffe and grabs it.
