- All Quotes
-
The DC Improv food is amazingly edible for a comedy club.
-
I don't think comedians make an active decision to be a certain "persona." Comedians write the way they're going to write.
-
What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a marketing meeting somewhere, 'Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.'
-
I do just want to do jokes. I don't want to be a divisive figure.
-
I've been doing theaters like the Warner for about a year and we've found the earlier you get the tickets on sale the better idea you get on how many shows we will be doing.
-
Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?
-
I spend way too much time on Facebook and MySpace to feel too uncomfortable at this. I like to think of the Internet as an effective way to waste time and time.
-
I think I grew up with the idea that God was a punishing being, constructed around rules.
-
We tend to outdo ourselves.
-
My faith kind of keeps me in touch with the idea that I'm not in control of things.
-
The amount of guilt you deal with as a parent is pretty profound. It's a constant balancing act. I'm an ambitious person, but when I became a father, ambition had a different hold on me. Providing for my kids was important, but the superficial ambition drifted away.
-
Faith is something that's - it's hard to articulate. It's - there's - it's not based on logic.