Funny Quotes
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I remember one guy saying, "You're the only human out of all of them," and feeling a little concerned that somehow that meant I wasn't as funny.
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Since the goal of my programs is to show audiences how humor can both help them heal as well as deal with not-so-funny stuff, I decided to discuss the events of the previous week, the pain all of us were feeling, and how humor and some laughter might be beneficial.
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When I was a kid my father would read Neil Simon plays with me when I was going to bed, as bedtime stories. All of these old plays like The Odd Couple and Lost in Yonkers - funny but corny plays about Jewish New Yorkers in the mid-20th century.
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Stop it. Seriously. This isn't funny.' 'You're right.' A pause. 'It's pathetic.
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Sometimes being lazy can get you in trouble. You ever not take a shower all weekend, just lounge around, then you're running late for work on Monday? There's always one person at work: "Something smells like smoke in here!" "Uh, I went to a barbeque on Friday night. Only had 48 hours to take a shower. Busy."
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I love comedians that dive into politics. I personally don't feel comfortable, with my background, weighing in unless I have a take that I think is funny enough that I would put it in front of an audience.
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Sometimes he hated that voice in his brain, the one that slapped him upside the head anytime he got too stupid. Funny, it happened a lot with Sienna.
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You need to be silly to be funny.
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I did a lot of sitcoms, and being funny isn't about being beautiful. Usually, beautiful people aren't the funny people.
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It's a funny thing, 'The Office,' because millions and millions and millions and millions of people didn't watch it. But culturally, it is more of a phenomenon than almost anything else I can remember as far as British television is concerned.
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Pie can't compete with cake. Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, someone's drunk in the kitchen.
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The Army has carried the American... ideal to its logical conclusion... Not only do they prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race, creed and color, but also on the grounds of ability.
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When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.
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I don't like comedy. I like funny things. I don't like comedy. Like, comedy movies are just, 'Oh Jesus.'
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I was raped by a doctor. Which is, you know, so bittersweet for a Jewish girl.
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I think it's cool to do stuff in a different language. Basically, I learned English through listening to rap. A lot of people think it's funny. But it's true; I used to try to get the accents.
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When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.
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Let's leave it all alone. I'm stupidest when I try to be funny.
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Progress is a continuing effort to make the things we eat, drink, and wear as good as they used to be.
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And regardless of the fact that in this country, certainly in the arts, we treat comedy as a second-class citizen, I've never thought of it that way. I've always thought it to be important. The last time I looked, the Greeks were holding up two masks. I've always thought of it not only as having equal value, but as the craft of it, being funny.
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I'm thankful for the talent in which God gave me and I'm thankful for the environment that he placed me.
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It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon.
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It's a sad day when a woman being funny and interested in science is considered newsworthy.
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To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.
