Funny Quotes
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He is very dry but also very funny... I think people tend to feel odd when I do my act. Unless you are an ironic person, it's not a good place for you to be.
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I'm on the Internet a lot more than I watch TV and most everybody I know is, and yet if you watch most late-night talk shows, it's as if it doesn't even exist. So the Internet, it's just something I wanted to make use of in some way. I was fascinated by what appeared to be a child singing this song. It just struck me as funny.
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I see some people with glasses here, I trust people with glasses, don't you? But if you're wearing your glasses like this ... "Get away from 'em!"
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A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something brussel sprouts never do.
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Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
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Every experience in your life is being orchestrated to teach you something you need to know to move forward.
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I am the funny, crazy person.
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Bob Davis has his hair differently this year, short with curls like Randy Jones wears. I think you call it a Frisbee.
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We have a habit in writing articles published in scientific journals to make the work as finished as possible, to cover up all the tracks, to not worry about the blind alleys or describe how you had the wrong idea first, and so on. So there isn't any place to publish, in a dignified manner, what you actually did in order to get to do the work, although, there has been in these days, some interest in this kind of thing.
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I like Donald. I guess I shouldn't call him that. I like President Trump. He's affable. He's funny.
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The other day in the garage, I found a book report from the seventh grade that I did about silent movie stars. It's funny to look at now, because it really foretold what my future would be.
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There is no insanity so devastating in man's life as utter sanity.
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It's funny how making odd noises can get you into strange situations sometimes.
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Visiting Future World is like opening a Chinese fortune cookie to read, "Soon you'll be finished with dinner."
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I did a lot of sitcoms, and being funny isn't about being beautiful. Usually, beautiful people aren't the funny people.
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It's funny when people say they see a lot of Madonna in me. I just feel so flattered because I love her and I am just her biggest fan. She is very strong. I love the way she does interviews -you know you won't get anything past her.
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Music and comedy are so linked. The rhythm of comedy is connected to the rhythm of music. They’re both about creating tension and knowing when to let it go. I’m always surprised when somebody funny is not musical.
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But you shall not escape my iambics.
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I'd like to make you laugh for about ten minutes though I'm gonna be on for an hour.
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It's funny that you [Zachary Quinto] did a monologue from Pounding Nails in the Floor With My Forehead. I did the same thing for my university when I went to USC.
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Let's leave it all alone. I'm stupidest when I try to be funny.
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When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.
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You know, I'm just a very boring, not very funny person in person. I don't feel pressured to be otherwise.
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Somewhere deep down there's a decent man in me, he just can't be found.
