Funny Quotes
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You ever get a postcard, you get so excited you don't even read it! "Hey I got a - who cares."
Jim Gaffigan
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They that go down to the sea in ships' see strange things, but what they tell is oft-times stranger still. A faculty for romancing is imparted by a seafaring life as readily and surely as a rolling gait and a weather-beaten countenance. A fine imagination is one of the gifts of the ocean-witness the surprising and unlimited power of expression and epithet possessed by the sailor. And a fine imagination will frequently manifest itself in other ways besides swear words.
Gertrude Bacon
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You know, the funny thing about Lorne and that show is that, you can go over one million things, but in a business of bean counters, he still likes to laugh at small things and creates a show around it.
Colin Quinn
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Every day after school for 10 years, I was on the set of 'Married... with Children,' which is a really funny and perverse place for a little girl in a Catholic school uniform to grow up.
Meghan Markle
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Funny, how once you touched off a memory, it was like pulling out a stitch—all the others kept unraveling.
Bel Kaufman
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I have an inability to enjoy things, but that's why we're in comedy. If we were happy, we wouldn't be funny, I guess.
Paul Feig
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My parents never put a lot of pressure on us to be any kind of way.... I have my funny moments where I look at myself and think, Oh, this is a disaster. But you have to give yourself a reality check and go, All right, if I feel this way, I'm going to do something about it that's healthy. I can't look at somebody who is 6 feet tall and 120 pounds and say, I'm going to get that body. That's just never going to happen. You have to work with what you've got.
Scarlett Johansson
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being funny is a way of being liked and a way of dealing with sadness.
Wendy Wasserstein
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When I die, so does hip hop.
Marshall Bruce Mathers III
Bad Meets Evil'
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Being funny, it turns out, is like being a bank. It's a confidence trick. As long as everyone believes in you, you are fine.
Evan Davis
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Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.
Mickey Rooney
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It's funny because I'm a sucker for glitz and glitter when it comes to clothes and nail polish, but with my makeup, I'm more comfortable with a natural look. It feels more like me.
Alison Sweeney
