Joke Quotes
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Quite frankly I think the press took it out of context. They … blew it out of proportion. It was just a joke. I didn't mean it in the way it was meant to be ... I apologize for it.
Akbar Al Baker
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There's a running joke among fans that Jack never goes to the bathroom. We had a scene where I was running towards a sign pointing ?BATHROOM' to the left and ?OFFICES' to the right. I did a double-take and ran towards the bathroom! We sent it in to the network, as a joke reel. But, quite frankly, nobody wants to see Jack Bauer go to the bathroom.
Kiefer Sutherland
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I have been blessed to work for so many years with great musicians. That's my joke with my manager: that I'm addicted to musicians.
Kathy Mattea
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I don't get the animosity when someone tells a joke that you don't like. Whereas if someone made a dish that you don't like if you went to a restaurant, you would either try another dish or you just don't go back to that restaurant. But you don't say like, "I did not like the hamburger here. This restaurant should be shut down. It should be banned from making hamburgers. No one else should have these hamburgers." And everyone else is like, "No, you wouldn't do that."
Brad Williams
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The wisest and the best of men, nay, the wisest and best of their actions, may be rendered ridiculous by a person whose first object in life is a joke.
Jane Austen
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At bottom the world isn't a joke. We only joke about it to avoid an issue with someone, to let someone know that we know he's there with his questions; to disarm him by seeming to have heard and done justice to his side of the standing argument.
Robert Frost
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In a theatre it happened that a fire started off stage. The clown came out to tell the audience. They thought it was a joke and applauded. He told them again, and they became still more hilarious. This is the way, I suppose, that the world will be destroyed-amid the universal hilarity of wits and wags who think it is all a joke.
Soren Kierkegaard
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You should not take old people who are already dead seriously. It does them injustice. We immortals do not like things to be taken seriously. We like joking. Seriousness, young man, is an accident of time. It consists, I don't mind telling you in confidence, in putting too high a value on time. I, too, once put too high a value on time. For that reason I wished to be a hundred years old. In eternity, however, there is no time, you see. Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke.
Hermann Hesse
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I've always been jealous of people who can tell stories really well in a room with a bunch of people. I've never been good at it because I'm not cocky enough to be like, "Okay, everyone, listen right now to this. I'm going to blow your minds with this joke."
Brendan Benson
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Contrary to reports, this boy is not a billionaire or going to be richer than any Beatle - and not just in the sense of money, by the way. The Beatles are untouchable. That’s just a joke.
Bono
U2
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I think a lot of people misinterpret what I'm doing because they think of it as just a joke or they think of it as disposable.
Casey Spooner
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Seriousness is an accident of time. It consists of putting too high a value on time. In eternity there is no time. Eternity is a moment, just long enough for a joke.
Hermann Hesse
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Couldn't we end this interview with what I really want to say? That what the world really needs is a real feeling of kinship -- everybody: stars, laborers, Negroes, Jews, Arabs. We are all brothers. If we could end this article saying just that, we'd get down to what we should all be talking about. Please don't make me a joke. End the interview with what I believe.
Marilyn Monroe
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The concept of democracy is a fucking joke. Rock’s supposed to shake things up and say, ‘Fuck that, this is shit, man! Let’s burn down the Houses of Parliament!’
Matt Bellamy
Muse
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I like to joke with my wife that she's the CEO of... certainly of our household.
Scott Pruett
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if she had ordered me to throw myself down then, I would have done it! If she had said it only as a joke, said it with contempt, spitting on me--even then I would have jumped!
Fyodor Dostoevsky