Funny Quotes
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Life's pretty funny when you're objectively on the outside looking at it.
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During sex I fantasize that I'm someone else.
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I think it's cool to do stuff in a different language. Basically, I learned English through listening to rap. A lot of people think it's funny. But it's true; I used to try to get the accents.
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The funny thing about the boy who gave away his loaves and fish is that he, too, ended the day with a full stomach.
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I'm the only man in the world with a marriage licence made out to whom it may concern.
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Everything is funny, if you can laugh at it.
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I can be educational, but if I'm not funny and entertaining, too, who's going to come and listen to me or watch me on TV.
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I like doing a funny show where I don't have to act and fall in love with a girl.
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One of life's most painful moments comes when we must admit that we didn't do our homework, that we are not prepared.
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Getting fan mail from Brazil is kind of funny.
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I never thought I was funny, but I enjoy being funny
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Well, I hope before Glenn goes, he'll come up here so we can give him a big hug and a kiss, because that's the kind of guy he is.
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You couldn't hope to make a drama and have people rewriting on the day and having the actors making suggestions, "Wouldn't it be funny if my character did this?" "No. You're the actor. I'll tell you what to do."
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Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullshit before.
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I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter.
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I knew exactly what to do on Alien, it was funny.
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The last time Pena faced the Padres, the Dodgers scratched for a run to tie the game and then went on to win 4-0.
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She, uh, came out of the closet recently, my niece. Um... She announced to the family that she's a lesbian and... She's seven, did I mention that? And, uh, I don't even know if she knows what a lesbian is, but I support her completely. And, uh... I'll tell you what's heartbreaking. My sister punished her for it. Can you believe that? No pussy for a week. Which to us may not sound like... But when you're seven, you know, a week is a long time.
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That big guy, Winfield, at 6'6", can do things only a small man can do.
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Looking back on the event, I find myself thinking there are three approaches to journalism represented here. One is the "cool" approach of traditional journalism, including network broadcasting in which NPR is no exception. One is the "hot" approach of talk radio, which has since expanded to TV sports networks and now Fox TV. The third is the engaged approach of weblogging.
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I took my father on a coach trip last summer.We were halfway there when the driver lost control of the coach, it flew down a hill around a bend and crashed through a brick wall. I wasn't hurt but luckily my father had the presence of mind to kick my head in.
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It’s funny how one summer can change everything.
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It's funny because when I first met with Carmen, she said, "Have you ever thought about doing TV?" And I was like, "No, not really, but I'd audition for TV." And she said, "That's where the roles are for women now. That's where you can go and get a really great part."
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It's funny how the present can change the past.
