Jokes Quotes
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I don't want to make compromises. I want my little silly jokes to be told with the correct punch line, and I'm satisfied trading off the immediacy to fulfill the detailed work of the artistic end of things.
Grant Hart
Hüsker Dü
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I like bowling. It's just one of those things where I can do so many jokes about it because I do know bowling. Somebody once said, "The whitest things in the world are Jim Gaffigan and bowling."
Jim Gaffigan
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Like everyone is either, "I grew up with it," or "I loved it," or loved them now. And when you watch The Muppet Movie now, it is so current. It's like The Simpsons before The Simpsons. It's not as cynical as The Simpsons would be but it's self-aware and there are a billion jokes, it breaks the fourth wall every five minutes, it's astounding, it's awesome. It's very exciting to be a part of that.
Nicholas Stoller
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I live right next to a grocery store and I don't know if it's the bachelor in me, but I just go in and shop for what I need for the day. I'm an idiot because I don't shop for the whole week. The check out clerks always crack jokes about the fact that I'm in there sometimes twice a day.
Sean William Scott
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I curse in everyday life, but usually when I stub my toe. The topics I'm discussing, it's not necessary to curse. I found [cursing] is a sign that a joke is not finished or well-written.
Jim Gaffigan
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Jokes are used to hide the truth!
Eric Jerome Dickey
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All the truly great stand-ups say, 'I go onstage, and I work on jokes. The inspiration will happen while I'm doing my work.' To me, in the end, the surest thing is work.
Patton Oswalt
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Family jokes, though rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive.
Stella Benson
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Soames, for example, who suddenly broke away after twenty years’ teaching and went off to be jokes editor to a firm of matchbox manufacturers.
Edmund Crispin
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Jokes spread around the world and embed themselves in our shared culture; the most resonant of them get lodged in the language in the same way as cliches or old wives' tales do.
Jimmy Carr
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I've found is that by doing stand-up, I've actually learned how to combat depression. I don't have clinical, but I've definitely had my bouts with it. I just figured out that it's a choice. You're in control of your brain. When your brain is sending you bad information or bad thoughts, you can decide to go to the gym, or write a new joke - or if you're on the road, go to a ball game... something that's going to get the blood going. Or you can let those thoughts take you right down the rabbit hole.
Bill Burr
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I myself am convinced that the theory of evolution, especially to the extent to which it has been applied, will be one of the greatest jokes in the history books of the future. Posterity will marvel that so very flimsy and dubious an hypothesis could be accepted with the incredible credulity it has.
Malcolm Muggeridge
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All my jokes are cries for help.
Trixie Mattel
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My father was the kind of guy who'd always say 'Throw out any subject and I got a joke on it,'
Carol Leifer
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For a comedian to kind of catch onto something right as something's catching on in our culture, a lot of it is luck, and you hope the joke is funny.
Jim Gaffigan
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And there's so much extra material. I mean, I've certainly read as you asked about do I read reviews and stuff, like people are like none of the jokes in the trailers are like in the movie. And it's like and we have whole sequences and scenes that weren't in the movie.
Nicholas Stoller
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Even where the game is today, cats don't really focus on necessarily what it is that you're saying so when people say, "Oh, you can't rap," I play into the joke. That's why I'll challenge anybody; anybody rapping, let's go just because I know what the art form is and even when you see these battle rappers in here, they're so skillful. It's actually a skill.
Nick Cannon
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I try to exist in a world where there is freedom of opinion, where you're allowed to make jokes. I don't want to live in some PC world where no-one's allowed to say anything.
Boy George
Culture Club
